Re: i'm back. walkingzombie: hey, croutonic-
every paragraph I read, I kept thinking,
"cant' seem to go another minute..." - guilty, hope I can aleviate your pain
"we didn't waste a minute together..."- guilty, I hope you can think of this as a positive experience, it was nice while it lasted, but my ex is waiting.
"she's jealous of your friend cuz she's closer to you", ghh, that's childish, but still GUILTY
"she's still inlove with you" maybe, but love doesn't conquer all huh, close but still, guilty
the point is, you can have all the hope you want, theorize the situation all you want, the bottom line is that her ex has a stronger ancor on her than you do,
that hurts, I know, but that should make it easier for you to let her go,
you're right, you deserve better...
Re: i'm back. watwat226: Hey croutonic, sorry you're going through this agian. It sux to have your heart stomped on again.
It seems that you were her rebound guy. Maybe to make her husband jealous so he can change? Perhaps. You were there to fill the void that her husband couldn't. But now realises what she could have and I guess she wants that in her husband probably due to the fact that they have a long history together. But her saying all that stuff to you doesn't help you one bit. It's like she's making you hold on. I guess she wants to have her cake and eat it too.
It's like you know how you have old clothes in the wardrobe? You see those clothes but don't throw them out. Convincing yourself that one day, you will wear that item of clothing once more. But just incase, you leave it there and not throw it out.
You are her item of clothing. She's says those things to you so you are just hanging there. So one day she might look back and use you again so to speak. Well that's my opinion anyway. I may be wrong. But I say give her the space she needs to work out her problems. But let her know it's either you or her husband. She can't have both. And yes, you do deserve to be wanted unequivocally.
If she can say those nice things about you then definately some other lady will also see it in you. Don't you set yourself up to fail aswell. Good luck buddy.
Re: i'm back. 2be: Welcome back, and sorry you have to BE back here. Well it's obvious that YOU were her rebound and that wasn't fair. It happens, though. I think the best you can do is be honest with her, tell her how much this hurts you but you want her to pursue every avenue so she can truly see where she stands.
I think it sucks, though. She should have taken the time to heal and find herself after her marriage broke apart before she got invovled with you.
Best of luck.
Re: i'm back. Chris: i agree with WZ.....
everything she says is exactly what's happening. she enjoyed having fun again with you and it was a break from her marriage, but it has also given her time to forget what drove her away to begin with. enjoy your last time with her and put no expectations on a future with her. nothing you say should insinuate a future meeting or a future at all with her. she feels grounded with her ex and i'm sure that's why she is going back. be careful not to be the person that she can just hook-up with when her marriage gets boring. i think she may be addicted to your attention and she may need a fix every now and then...............don't feed her addiction.
Re: i'm back. walkingzombie: No, no!, ok, i'm sorry i disagree with 2B on this one, I think she knows how much you're hurt, she doesn't need to be reminded, she feels guilty- which is why she's saying all this "you're the best I've ever had,,... always gonna love you...." bulls$$$t,
I recommend you let her walk, listen to her reasonings, that's it, all you need to know is that all her "love" she has for you isn't enough to keep her there. end of story.
she wants to talk to you so she can ease your pain and you won't hater her for it, she wants you to support her on this and convince you that it's the right decision.
I don't hate women, I am a woman, but I regret to admit that I've done this... I've said this, it's insecurity and guilt. But the decision was made...
I can't take back what I've done, but I know that I'll never put a guy through that pain again.
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