Re: Infidelity fkunone: Ok people. I don't care if it bothers someone "less" or "more" or whatever "degree" you'd like to place it in. There is no infidelity meter, no infidel-o-fix. Infidelity is a poison that knows no master, and loves every host. The trust has been broken and it changes the ENTIRE landscape of the relationship. And no matter of hope, saying I forgive you to be a bigger person or what not is going to fix that. Watch. You'll see.
Re: Infidelity C-Note: [quote author=crushedman link=topic=29053.msg282511#msg282511 date=1147886431">
... If I was married and and my wife had a one night stand, the aftermath would be so ugly that the marriage would be destroyed. I just don't have the emotional control that some people have.
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I've been following this thread and keeping my mouth shut because my opinion on fidelity varies from day to day.. moment to moment.
[quote author=corkscrew link=topic=29053.msg282491#msg282491 date=1147885280">
I realize that people have weaknesses of the flesh, so I truly could get over an infidelity in error, but I would have to break up with someone who does it constantly (its just disrespectful) and I'd have to break up with someone who falls in love with someone else while with me.
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As a shallow person I can admit I get weak at times. Having been on both ends of the fidelity stick to some degree I know it hurts everyone in the end. Every "cheaters" got their excuses and every "cheated on" deals with it in their own way. Some leave and some stay, but nothing will ever be the same.
Re: Infidelity katelyn: Perhaps it's a matter of how strong your feelings go? This is just a possible explanation.
I've never been a jealous person. The thought of a boyfriend cheating was of course hurtful, but it wasn't something that would've driven me crazy and destroyed me. I would've just broken up with them and been on my way. Or perhaps just forgiven and forgotten.
Until I met someone who I was head over heels crazy in love with. Then all of a sudden my entire existance was in his hands. He could have obliterated me. I definately became very protective because I knew how bad he could hurt me. I was very concerned about other ladies.
My sister and her husband have a very platonic relationship. No drama, no fighting, no emotions running high. They're just best friends. He knew she had feelings for his best friend and was still willing to let the dude move in. It's not like he WANTED something to happen, but he wasn't all that concerned about it was he, or he would've prevented it. She ended up saying she didn't think it was a good idea (good girl) so they agreed the best friend could not move in.
He says he's just not a jealous person. But perhaps my sister's husband does not have the intense feelings involved where his world would be destroyed if she was unfaithful. To be honest, he acts more jealous about MY love life (he used to have a thing for me when we were teenagers).
Anyway, just an observation....
Re: Infidelity C-Note: Just my personal take... there's much more to it then this, but I like to visualize things as simple as possible.
Re: Infidelity 2be: Interesting thought, Katelyn...
Going back a bit....I dont associate jealousy with a strong dislike for infidelity. I was SO not jealous with my X, and I knew how gorgeous she was, how flirty she was. In my opinion, when you say "I DO" or even before that.... when you are dating and agree to be exclusive... that's it. You put 100% of yourself into that relationship. It has nothing to do with being jealous or possesive of your spouse/girlfriend/whatever.
Cheating whether emotional, physical or both is flat out wrong. It goes against what a REAL RELATIONSHIP is. Two people together. Not three. I simply cannot fathom cheating on someone, ever.
If I was unhappy, I would tell them and it either would end or it would be worked out. I would NEVER seek affection from someone else. And I don't buy the "it was just a one-night stand" thing either. Drunken or not. It's still cheating, it's still wrong, and if you don't have enough willpower then you shouldn't be in a dedicated relationship at all.
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