Re: Infidelity fkunone: It doesn't make him better off for it or handle it any better than anybody else. It'll come up again. We could go back and forth on this. If he seems ok, then fine, he's ok.
Re: Infidelity 2be: Yeah, I agree. They may be able to do that, but I don't see how. I guess it comes down to how important you think exclusivity is with your spouse. Me, I am 100% faithful. So cheating is inexcusible.
When my X cheated on me the first time, and "apparently" only was a kiss (but not just casual... they meant to do it and it was romantic) I forgave her. But what I didn't realize then (now I do) that it caused me SO much pain and betrayal, even though I said "I forgive you" and I believed I did... I really didn't. It hurt SO bad.
So when it happened the second time, and it was a LOT more than a kiss, I knew I couldn't accept her back again. I've forgiven her, but I refuse to put myself back in a situation where I would get hurt again. In my opinion, once...shame on you. Twice, shame on me.
Re: Infidelity fkunone: I see cheating as inexcusable on both sides, regardless of who is more faithful or not. If I was the infidel, I'd get out of the relationship. That I learned. Been on both sides. Sucks on either end.
Re: Infidelity corkscrew: I think infidelity bothers people more if they in fact have considered being unfaithful. I think its more a well I wanted to and I didn't and YOU DID? For me I don't believe cheating is the worst thing that a person can do to you. I know I could forgive a person for a one night stand that just happened. However, I would have difficult continuing on in a relationship with someone who makes a habit of it, even though the affair was only physical. There is absolutely no way I could continue in a relationship with someone who has had an emotional affair though.
I realize that people have weaknesses of the flesh, so I truly could get over an infidelity in error, but I would have to break up with someone who does it constantly (its just disrespectful) and I'd have to break up with someone who falls in love with someone else while with me.
Re: Infidelity crushedman: Corkscrew is a perfect example of what I was talking about. It's fascinating to me. If I was married and and my wife had a one night stand, the aftermath would be so ugly that the marriage would be destroyed. I just don't have the emotional control that some people have.
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