Re: When to start? Maximus: Here's my take:
I stay celebate for 4 to 5 months at a time since I am working overseas. Been doing this on and off for 2 years. I am so tempted right now, since she is divorcing me, but as long as I am "still married" I cannot do it. Tempting, but even if she cheated on me, I couldn't do the same to her.......to me it is unethical and immoral, but to each his or her own. Now, as soon as I come home and have signed that piece of toilet paper of a divorce document, I will be free as a bird to do whatever I want to.
I would say that you should start when your heart is healed. Another thing - bad idea to do it while you are still married, even if you are seperated and she has filed.
We might all have different views on this.
Re: When to start? shockedandamazed: Welcome to Ojar - I personally decided not to even entertain the idea of being interested in anyone until my divorce was final. Since I was betrayed and abandoned I knew that if I had not set some ground rules for myself I might end up 'running amuck' trying to prove to myself that I was still attractive to men, which could only end up hurting me even more.
So - the day after my divorce was final, I went out and celebrated New Years Eve with a close friend. Then, I went out from then on with the idea of just meeting new people.
They are right, the first few dates and phone calls are so, so awkward! But - don't go into them with the mind frame of trying to get them out of the way. One of my first dates was with someone I really truly liked!!
