Update:Totaly Lost and Frustrated xiphoidfugu: For those who don't know my story, here it is
http://ojar.com/boards/index.php/topic,28767.msg280140.html#msg280140
Update: We are still together, barely. We've gone through quite a bite since I last posted. I took a demotion at work to try and lessen my stress...which isn't workin so far. Now I'm doing the job I was doing and the one I dropped to....sometimes both on the same night. Not to mention we've lost 6 people on my shift which leaves us severly short handed. So my work stress has drastically increased. Home life...I've been keeping busy....trying to anyway. My wife and I fought the other night and the police were involved. The next morning I came home from work and my wife was severly depressed and took some pills. I called 911 and we ended up at the hospital for the day. She was OK but we talked to a mental health nurse who has also taken courses in councelling for family issues. We both feel we got alot out in the open. Now we need to really start working to solve and resolve alot of issues. We need to find ourselves and figure out who we are. I think we've both had to grow up so fast together (we had our first child when she was 16 and I was 17) and never had time to develop who we are as individuals. So even though we haven't been officially separated or divorced...I feel like we are working towards being two new people, and the us that we were Are officially over. So here's to the life ahead, whatever it may hold.
Re: Update:Totaly Lost and Frustrated audi_driver: well bud....I read your post.....
I will say it bluntly because that's how I like it. She doesn't really sound like she wants to be married. Your marriage is your marriage but in my eyes, I would cut my loses. This seems to have been going on a long time and is not getting better.
Rule#1 If someone chooses another person over their mate, they aren't worth your time.
Rule#2 Flirting, partying and probably cheating while you are working is not acceptable.
You need to put your foot down man.......Put it down now......
Start focusing on the kids.......Start documenting things.....start getting witnesses.....
I am going to send you something to your email box
Re: Update:Totaly Lost and Frustrated Melbel: While I fon't have proof that he cheated on me (his bf told me). You need to cut your loses. For me..this is my two cents.\
If she is willing to lay down with another man she is willing to lose you!! Sleeping with someone else while married is wrong!
Be strong and we will help you get through this!
Mel
Re: Update:Totaly Lost and Frustrated audi_driver: [quote author=Melbel link=topic=29502.msg288451#msg288451 date=1148877046">
While I fon't have proof that he cheated on me (his bf told me). You need to cut your loses. For me..this is my two cents.\
If she is willing to lay down with another man she is willing to lose you!! Sleeping with someone else while married is wrong!
Be strong and we will help you get through this!
Mel
[/quote">
Like I said in my PM........
You CAN EASILY get custody of your children if you move on it RIGHT NOW.....All you need is to point out the pills and hospital visit and you will get the custody.....
Your #1 concern is your children.....Forget the wife for right now.....Look what is happening while you are working!!! What are the children seeing and hearing.
Go file and get temp. custody of the children.......
Re: Update:Totaly Lost and Frustrated bluskygrl: I've been on the receiving side of crazy and know it can be a long exhausting soul sucking journey.
I would say if she is willing to put 100% into this after her hospital visit then it may be worth it...
but if you end up doing the work it will only make things harder for you and your children without her changing one bit
The way I read your story you have done everything and more that anyone could ever expect. The rest is up to her.
Sorry there is no easy cure for this.
Blu
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