Re: Update:Totaly Lost and Frustrated audi_driver: [quote author=xiphoidfugu link=topic=29502.msg288420#msg288420 date=1148871941">
Now we need to really start working to solve and resolve alot of issues. We need to find ourselves and figure out who we are.
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Sound like you already know who YOU are.......She has been this way for over a decade......Did you ever stop to think that this just might be the way she is and that there is nothing to change to????
Re: Update:Totaly Lost and Frustrated xiphoidfugu: I have put my foot down....the partying has stopped....she's broken ALL ties with this other guy, and I believe she will keep ties broken. She is suffering alot of stress, because of my problems. I am no angel and have my share of issues that cause problems in this. The last two weeks I have been thinking about who I am and have realized I have lost myself...so no I don't know who I am anymore. I know the type of person I am personality wise, but I don't know what I want in life or what makes me happy anymore. I've lost all my hobbies. As for her she hasn't been THIS way for over a decade, she has done alot of things over a decade but her values and interests have changed drastically over this time. "From one extreme to the other" every councillor we/I/She has talked to has said. She just needs to learn where the middle ground is. Councillors have told her and I that the type of person I am (deep thinker), I can help her find that middle ground. She is the type of person who just does something and then thinks about it afterwards. The councillor told her that she needs to hear what I have to say and take it as possibly good advice, instead of looking at it as me trying to control her. I'm not trying to control her, I'm just trying to work with her and she thinks if she can't do it herself then she is weak. (Her childhood was a mess, she took care of the house, paid bills, made meals, etc. because of alcoholic father, and I am witness to that) This will work out for us..whether we are together in the future or find we are completely uncompatible...at least we can do this together and if it's not right...avoid a dirty breakup. Unfortunately for us, it had to come down to all of this before we could get some help. The services in this town are the abosolute worst and the rate of family issues including abuse, substance abuse, alcoholism, etc. are the worst of any county in Canada. I think it's time someone went to the government and tell them to step up support lines in my area. Maybe that's something I could do. Anyway, I've kinda lost track what I've talked about, but I could go on for hours on all kinds of things that happpened/is happening between us.
