Can someone explain this? Hopeless: I know that many of you that have read my posts dont really care for who I am, but I can say that I have taken the adivce of most and ended the EA with the OW.
Here is my question:
My STBXW and I had a conversation this weekend and she indicated that she had been asked out by a man at her work and she feels that she is not ready to start dating. She is the one that left because of how she felt about me. She has indicated that she did not like the way that we were together and that is why she ended the marriage of 12 years and 2 kids. She then asked me if I was "getting laid" yet. I told her no, but that I am developing feelings for another woman. This was met with little or no response,
I ask.....why, if I was the reason that she left, is she not ready to start dating yet? You would think that if it was about US and not about something with her, that she would jump at the chance to be with someone that would make her feel good. I am just confused by this and was wondering what to think.
I know that I have said numerous times that I am over the marriage (sep 9 months), but maybe I am not quite as over it as I first thought. This is really bothering me. I would give anything to get my family back together. I get to hear about her troubles with buying a new house and affording everything. Why is this still one of my concerns? Is she just screwing with my head?
?
Re: Can someone explain this? walkingzombie: I think she asked you if you've gotten "laid" yet to see where you're at in life, maybe a little security blanket- dunno
I think she told you about this man, not because she's not ready, but (just my opinion) because she might be ready and if you see them together, she wants to give you a heads up,
that way, if you see them, she can say, "well, I went out with him to get my mind off things..."
Re: Can someone explain this? tryingtofigureout: I want to bring this one back to life just try and answer the one question:
[quote">
I ask.....why, if I was the reason that she left, is she not ready to start dating yet?
[/quote">
I was the one who left in my last relationship yet I'm devastated by the experience, completely afraid to date, and not sure when I might find the courage or drive to try and meet another woman. I don't know your specific situation, but I do know that just because one leaves doesn't mean they are ready to go get it on right away. At least I know this is true for me.
Re: Can someone explain this? Melbel: As long as you take care of your kids (that includes be nice to their mom) other then that...I think she is just checkin to see where you are at and see if you were having sex again. I personal would not read to much into it.
She may not want you but she wants you to be with someone else even more! Sorry was that harsh...
Re: Can someone explain this? audi_driver: I believe it has more to do with guilt than anything else. My wife asked me if I was dating a travel agent because I booked 4 trips within the last month, 2 of which are to Eurpoe. I said yeah.....I'm dating someone and begging you to come back at the same time. Give me a break....I love you.......
She wants to feel that you are OK with everything. If she sees that you have moved on, she will be able to sleep better at night and not feel as guilty.
It has nothing to do with getting laid.
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