What Did I Do? soblue: I know relationships end sometimes. That's part of life. It's not easy, it's not good, it just is. But what did I do to make you hate me so much? What did I do? Why won't you talk to me? Why won't you even acknowledge me? Why won't you even pretend like we were in love once and throw me a small smile or a look or something to let me know that you even know I am still alive...? It was just weeks ago that you told me you loved me. Months ago that you told me you were committed to me. We're not talking about a slow gradual decline here... I was always there for you. Always. I loved you and still love you, and I did everything I could to make this as easy on you as possible. I am not asking for the relationship back - I am past that. I am asking for something more meaningful than that... I am simoly asking for one little sign that you cared at one point and that maybe - maybe - a very little piece of you still cares about me. You crushed me already - do you need to keep doing it over and over again?
What did I do to deserve this...? Especially from the one person I trusted to protect my heart. What did I do?
Re: What Did I Do? chiefkyle: Are you my stbxw?
Sounds like what we went through.
*STBX* I still love you, but I can't show you. If I talk to you, I'll start thinking about you. I'll fall in love with you, all over again. I'll hurt all over again. By not talking to you, I'm trying to fool myself into beleaving I never cared.
I will always be thinking about you. No matter what I do, or who I'm with, I'll always have flashbacks of the BEST time of my life. I will always love you. I'm going to do my best not to think about you, so I don't feel guilty for what I did, and how I hurt you.
Hows that?
Re: What Did I Do? soblue: Well, it's something. Right now I'll take anything. I'd feel better if she came right up to me and said
"I am never going to talk to you again and I am going to pretend you never existed because deep down I loathe you and I have always hated you and I was just using you for sex/money/affection/trips/laughs and I am now interested in finding a real man who can give me what I need and you are just a pitiful piece of crap".
I am confident enough to know that the sex was great, the money was green, the affection was sincere, the trips were phat, and the laughs were on me and I'll accept the feedback, tell her to go to hell, and move on with my life. At least I'll have something. But right now I have NOTHING!!! I don't knowwhat I did, I just don't know...
I can accept tough feedback... I really can. But this is unbearable.
Re: What Did I Do? chiefkyle: My bad. Thought you was a girl. Hence the **HIM**. Changed it to **STBX**.
I would tell you to get out, but you already know that. Would tell you to meet new people, but your probably at that stage where you hate people (unless their like you, going through what you are). Best advice IS to find somehting to do with yourself. Doesn't matter if it obsessivly cleaning your house. Do something besides sit around and think.
Lot of people sugguest the GYM. Can you do that? Betters your self estem and your body, while you get out pent up aggression. Find a hobby. I know that sounds like a wide option of things. Hell I don't even have a hobby. I don't even know what a "Hobby" is, or where to find "One".
I sit on my computer and bitch. So I guess thats my hobby. I get things out, and feel better (sometimes).
Re: What Did I Do? whisp: Why do you assume you did something and are now being punished?
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