Does it ever end? fkunone: It's those smaller moments in the day, when I find a lyric or two that reminds me of you. It's those idle moments that make me want to cringe and reach for you at the same time. Why couldn't you see all the color I had for you? Why couldn't you see me trying? Why did you leave me on the side of the road while you went to go look for other things? Don't you know you had a treasure here? Right. Here.
See all this? See this here? See this determination, this hard work? See this discipline? See this devotion? Love? Adoration?
I guess you didn't. Guess you couldn't. Guess right now you'd much rather not. I mean, you have him right now, don't you? Another target. Another mess. How long before you blow up on him? How long before you realize he ain't all that and he gets on your nerves? Is it on to another, my little butterfly?
See, you could blow up on me, rag on me, and I'd know that you couldn't mean it completely, because you knew just how good I was, with everything. Including you. I supported you, loved you, probably even smothered you. But now your opinions matter little to me.
Do you think he could accept all your kids? Challenges, as they were, I loved them dearly. But now, they just stand there, smiling and missing me.
Do you think he'd support your hobbies? How's that coming along? I wish I could ask, but we're not on that level anymore.
Do you think he thinks your as beautiful as I sometimes think you still are? Your eyes, your hair, your kiss, your touch? All laced with angel's glitter? You float when you walk. You sing when you smile. You burst with color when you laugh.
But I also remember all the bitter things about you. My love wanted to make it sweet. The walls, the barriers, the hanging resentments like monkeys on your back. Why didn't you want to work through them when we had the chance?
This could've been beautiful and I hate that I can see potential in so many things. I wish I could just believe this was all ugly and ill-fated from the start.
Then maybe it could be one more foot forward for me, one more tear gone.
I miss you, in these tiny moments.
But before they get tinier, I feel like screaming big things at you. Anything to make you realize...that I loved you.
Re: Does it ever end? corkscrew: Beautifully worded.
Re: Does it ever end? nidra: Didn't think it was possible ... but your post actually made my eyes swell a bit. I feel deeply moved and inspired. Thank you.
