Frustration justmenow: J -
I hope you can understand why I get so upset with this situation about the kids - most of the time I feel like I'm fighting this battle all alone each day, every day. I'm the only one there nagging the kids about the homework and having to deal with the "I don't know"s and the arguing and the fighting and everything else. The teachers call me on a weekly basis, I know it's to keep me informed, but it always has this accusing undertone to the conversation that goes like: "You're a bad Mom", "You don't spend enough time with your kid because you work", "All the other kids are smarter than yours", "You should be doing more for her", "You couldn't keep your marriage together and now your kid is ruined forever" That's not what actually they say, but it's what I hear.
There's only so much one person can take and it sometimes makes me SO mad that I'm the one having to make all the sacrifices for the kids. You get to go out every night and have a life while I'm at home actually raising OUR kids - KEEPING my commitment as a parent. I am there constantly nagging about homework, helping with homework, being a referee, cooking, shuttling kids here and there, mowing, doing housework, etc. Here's a newsflash - any monkey can be trained to write a child support check. Writing a check isn't considered "doing your part". It isn't ABOUT the money - you never did get that, did you? Your kids need you, not a check. You can't buy your way out of Fatherhood.
It's just not fair. If it were me being offered a job opportunity out of state or out of the country, what do you think I would have to do? Here's a word you need to learn: sacrifice.
Can you understand why I'm frustrated and overwhelmed? They are just as much your kids as mine. I'm sorry if this makes you mad, but that's how I feel...and frankly, it makes me even madder that I'm sorry for making you mad because you really deserve to be even just a little bit miserable right now like me. How sad it must be not to have any emotions.
V
PS - I actually sent this to him too.
