Re:Idle Minds JustMe: Definitely not abnormal.
It's hard, but I try to consume my time talking to supportive friends and family, read books on divorce as well as fiction stuff, and spend time at work as a good way to numb my way through this. Junk food and driving aimlessly for hours works wonders also.
At times, the pain gets to a level where I can work on it by resolving some stuff, so it helps to take baby steps through this.
Re:Idle Minds Katie Wesley: I'm about 7 weeks out of my relationship, and I'm working on a degree. We're on break right now, and I'm inbetween jobs, so I'm very inactive.
As everyone else has said, you're definately not abnormal. Since I've had so much time to myself, I've been wallowing as someone else above wrote. However, as bb wrote balance is a good thing. You don't even have to balance things equally. You can still spend your hardest parts of the day keeping busy. Then, if you can pick a time of day that you're usually doing better in, pull out a picture or listen to a song -let your grief out little by little.
Staying active is GOOD, and your pain will subconsiously work itself out even when you're not thinking about it. Still, take little time every day to be sad. Then after that little time or even in another part of the day, remind yourself of the good things in your life. Probably as time continues, you'll find yourself naming more and more positive aspects in your life.
At least you don't have a severe depressive disorder. You'd be sleeping all the time and not getting anything done.
Keeping yourself going is an emotionally healthy person's way of dealing with pain. You'll be alright. You should know that because you want to be better -that's why you joined the site. Right?! ;)
Re:Idle Minds blue_eyes: I think that staying busy is about the most healthy way to deal with "grief". It would certainly be much worse to allow yourself to be consumed in it. As Katie said..you want to get better and I think that is the key. I also was told once that when you are "mourning" that if it is good idea to take a particular time each day, even a particular place to think about those sad things that you are working through. Use that time to think about it and work it out within you. If you supposedly do this you aren't "allowed" to do it at other times of the day. They say, (whoever they is??) time heals all wounds. I know it has healed a great deal for me. Of course, the ones that have been healed in the past aren't issues now, so it's hard to remember the past painful times that have passed. But, I know that even the hurt I'm experiencing now is subsiding a little more each day. Just know where you are going..and one day you will be there!!
As far as your possible abnormality....as far as I'm concerned abnormality IS normality at its finest!
Re:Idle Minds Katie Wesley: Definately, Blue_Eyes! 8)
