Another question.... ostia: Do any of you find yourself wondering whether ALL relationships are doomed?
Ever since I split with my X I've been thinking a lot about marriage itself, and I do wonder if it's possible to be happy with one person forever. My parents have been married for almost 40 years and they seem happy, but they have both had to squelch a lot of their individuality in order to live together peacefully, and they both have made HUGE sacrifices over the years. In my darker moments I wonder if it's worth it.
Maybe it's just that I had a bad experience with marriage, or that I've read so many horror stories on this board :-\, but I do feel pretty pessimistic sometimes.
Have any of you maintained a strong belief that living happily ever after with someone isn't a nearly unattainable dream?
Re:Another question.... justmenow: That's a hard question, especially for those of us that have been burned - we're going to try to avoid fire for a while...
Maybe it's like having a baby - not a pleasant overall experience, yet many do it over and over again. I know that when I got into my last relationship with a man, I experienced blissful "amnesia" about my marriage. Frankly, I never thought about all the problems I had in my marriage because I was too happy. That can be dangerous.
Believe me, I wonder the very same things, which is what is keeping me single right now. Well, that and the fact that I don't have a man in my life. Haha. ???
Re:Another question.... jason_stl: I would imagine there are a thousand great love and romance stories to everyone story posted about a broken heart here.
I still believe in the power of love and marriage. I learned a lot about myself through my divorce and it gives me hope in the future. You just have to turn life's lemons into lemonade.
Re:Another question.... incoherentlonghorn: Without a shadow of a doubt or I will die trying! :P
*Edit Relationships are not doomed without a shadow of a doubt :-\
I meant I believe that long term happiness is not only possible but a noble endeavor.
Re:Another question.... seth: You said something about how your parents had to sacrafice a lot of individuality to make a good partnership. Hello? Isn't that what marriage is all about. Why should everyone get what they want all of the time?
We're social creatures, we need other people. You have to make sacrifices for other people to make it work. Popular American culture has convinced us that this is a bad thing and that individuality is better than making a good partnership. I never beat my lady or kept her in the house, I just wanted her to be around when I got home. I was willing to work w/ her and be flexible and be a modern man, but that wasn't good enough for her. She needs to be totally independent and able to go somewhere for up to a month alone.
That's just not what I'm looking for... Sorry, this doens't make much sense, I'm ranting....
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