Re: When will I stop needing this? fkunone: [quote author=snkpack link=topic=30548.msg303353#msg303353 date=1151087217">
Ojar's like crack. I'm way over my divorce and I'm still here. ::)
[/quote">
And look at me, I'm way over my crack habit. And I'm still divorced!!! LOL.
Re: When will I stop needing this? Plucky: You rock, Jug. LMAO
Re: When will I stop needing this? 2be: Thanks all... just seems like all I've felt for the last year is pain. I realized it really HAS been almost a year since the eye-opening that my anxiety and depression was caused by my marriage to a woman whom I let abuse me for 11-years. We DID had some great times together and I will always remember those with fondness, but still. One year of horrible anxiety and depression, 8 months since we decided to divorce, 4.5 of me living on my own, and 3 months of official divorce. Not very long, granted.... but it feels like an eternity.
And the other part of me sits here and thinks: What would've happened, where would I be right now if I had made the choice NOT to follow her to that far-away city? If I would have sat and contemplated where I wanted my life to go WHEN SHE ASKED ME. But I didn't... I blindly told her I wanted to follow her and didn't think about the direction of my own life. I was just too young, too immature (and too in love) to think about myself. Would I be in a good relationship, loving, fullfilling, kids, a home?
I know it's stupid to think about it... I have to make the best of my life now and I am grateful that at least I can start over with some semblance of sanity left. The upward climb just got a bit steep for me today...
Ugh.
Re: When will I stop needing this? hr: Jug,
You said way over your crack habbit. Which one?
Re: When will I stop needing this? ctrlaltdelete: 2be - I haven't read very far back on your posts, but have you been to counseling?
For me to "snap out of it" it took prayer, counseling, exercise, new hobbies, one failed antidepressant prescription, a couple of rebound relationships, and eventually just time.
Be patient. It's okay for you to cry and be upset, just don't let it rule your life. I think every one of us here deserves an Oscar and an Emmy for our award winning "I'm okay" performances to the world. Yes, it is fake, but sometimes if we act it out long enough some of us start to believe it.
If you get stuck in a rut, review what's going on in your life. Are you trying to live some semblance of what was your normal life or are you working to rebuild a new one without her in it? Try something radical. Go somewhere you've never been, try something you've never tried, go to one of those OJAR gatherings (it's a blast...). Don't worry about being addicted to OJAR - that too will pass. Like most of us you come here for answers and you cling to what's left of your sanity, needing to be reassured, propped up, encouraged, etc. then you wander away for a while only to return and prop up those who are where you used to be. It's the circle of life my friend.
Best of luck to you.
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