Bleeding drowned: I am tired of thinking about you! I want to wake up and have other thoughts in my mind. I am tired of bleeding for such a selfish and inconsiderate person that you have become. You have been that for a few years and I would've never thought you would've changed in the manner that you did. I cannot believe I still hurt for you. Why, why, why...I always ask myself to this day. We have seperated before for 5 months. So, did that make it easier for you to up and leave? You had better be sure you made the right choice because you now must live with that choice. I don't want you back....nor do I wish for you back. What I want back is my happiness. You vendictive little bitch, I resent you more and more for what you have become. I have these visions of one day you really hitting that rock bottom slump....that same slump I am crawling out of, and it will be your turn to suffer.
Who knows though what the hell your doing or going through. For all I know you may have already met someone else or just enjoying your summer vacation with all your divorced friends. I guess you really belong now huh! You were always never really part of any crowd yet you thought you were the life of the party. It was really funny to see that at times. I just didn't want to say anything and hurt your feelings. You know I have some dirt on you and you know what it is. Do I dare ruin your reputation and what people would think of you if I told them? I know your sister being into that aspect of life would probably disown you. You know what I am talking about and if you ever cross paths with me or try to fuck me in any other way I will ruin your life for good. Am I sounding a bit shitty and revengeful?.....yes I am because it's my bleeding heart that is telling me.
How can I put into any other words besides coward...that you up and leave when I was gone at work. I checked the phone records awhile back and you placed a call 3 minutes after I had walked out the door to your parents to tell them "mommy mommy daddy daddy come to my rescue and help me clean out the house before G gets back from work I wanna leave him so I can be with my friends and stop having to be tied down and live my own life but yet I really don't have a reason to leave him for none other than my own selfish motives". You bitch, if I ever see you again you are going to see me so happy because I will never want you again. I may even one day move from here and never look back. There is so much now I can do.
You know what I am going to do! After the divorce I am going to buy an Acura NSX mid-90's car and celebrate my new life. That house is going to be mine and you know it. Your now at home with mommy and daddy so why would you want to live in a house you never were at to begin with? All my neighbors pretty much wouldn't show you the slightest bit of respect. They all saw you on that Saturday afternoon toying with my life while I was at work. Everyone that there was a garage sale because of all of OUR stuff you had in the driveway waiting for trucks to come back and pick more up. I must admit you organized yourself rather well but you are getting so f*cked by doing what you did. Keep everything you took I don't want it nor need it.....I start my days without your memories that is why I own no pictures of you anymore and that was my choice to do. I won't look back I will always see you as the cowardly and immature piece of shit you have become. That was my last vision of you and there is no changing that.
Re: Bleeding Roseville: Drowned~
You've definately hit the angry stage, and that's good - that's another step in the right direction.
Jen
Re: Bleeding icwtsmnl: be strong. hold on to that feeling for a while. it helps moving forward. we're with you.
Re: Bleeding drowned: Thanks Jen and icw.....I am with you both too ;)
