my week Bird: Dear J,
So it's been a week since I last wrote. Tonight, I'm in-I'm supposed to be working on all those bloody reports, but can't seem to focus..any guesses as to why? haha! God, you are the bane of my existence at the moment. No, I lie- your not, our past is.
Anyway, so I had a pretty tremendous start to the week. Finalising things with you on the financial side of things was a huge relief. You are obviously scared sh!tless that I was going to take you to the cleaners and then some, as I've never known you to be such a doormat. LOL, oh well. As you can tell from the finalised list of things I want sent over, I've left you with pretty much everything- all except for the canteen of cutlery- why fish knives? haha! All those dinner parties my love ;) To be quite honest, I was tempted to take everything, and then sell them on ebay, but to be honest- I realise more and more each day how little I want of you. All except a clean slate.
I still can't believe you thought I was rushing the divorce. I just don't get it. You are such a confused, confused man. You don't want a divorce, yet you won't work at our marriage and won't give up the woman...and what, you expect me to hang around until she leaves the country to realise how lonely it is living there so you can then tell me that you were wrong and I'll come back?? Well, forget you.
I had a such fantastic adrenaline rush as I filled out those forms. What was weird was that I felt relieved and happy to not be bound by you anymore.
However all that said, I still miss having you around. Is that the companionship you talked about- probably yes. You were also my best friend. And that I miss terribly. I've realised over the course of this week that I am ok on my own. Yes it is lonely, but as some would say, it's character building.
Anyway, I guess I should tell you- IW has asked for my CV to pass on to some of his cronies on the Hill. Can you imagine me working in DC on the Hill- what a laugh. They're apparently starting up some commission in my field. Not sure I'm quite ready to play that level of politics. But it would be a laugh wouldn't it.
I've also managed to score myself an internship. I'm meeting the Director next thursday and am pretty chuffed. Fingers crossed that it's actually worth doing.
Today I went for my assessment test at Alliance Francaise, to brush up my business french. I didn't do too badly actually- better than I thought- anyway, I'm on a six week intensive course from Monday before I can write the DEFL- it's the diploma they offer...so I should be deemed proficient- whatever that means.
And I also went shopping on Oxford St. LOL! God I hate crowds and shopping...put the two together--- needless to say, I did all my shopping in one store! A small version of retail therapy. It's the first time I've done something for myself since we split. It was good. I bought two really nice tops (kinda gauzy kaftan like tops) and two tank tops to wear underneath and a pair of white trousers and a pair of jeans. Thanks to you, I've dropped two sizes. Guess there is a bonus to the split....saved me from at least six months of watching what I eat and extensive cardio to get to this size and the extortionate gym fees.
A is coming for a month in August. Can't wait. We're going to go on the Master Cleanse- apparently you only drink lemonade for 10 days- it's supposed to completely clean out your intestines and colon and stuff like that...haha! wonder how long i'll last ;) We're heading to Geneva so I can scout out some contacts for a job starting in May next year.
At the end of August, I think I'm going to head to Boston for week or so. This way I don't have to see you, and I'll be busy on your birthday and an ocean apart. Remember last year- the scavenger hunt I organised for you all over London. God that was fun.
Anyway, I have to get back to work. Have so much to do, and I've planned a picnic with Jacco tomorrow in Regents Park.
Nx
