stupid man - advise please PnR: Ok here's the thing. I met this guy a couple of months ago through someone at work. He was very friendly and outgoing and kept putting his arms around me and although I wasn't immediatly attracted to him I went along with it.
Well after our first date I was really attracted to him and him to me. Well the problem is he is 4 years younger than me. I was hoping it would not be a problem but it has turned out to be as he says he needs to find himself first before getting into a serious relationship.
He has messed me around so much and stood me up so many times since then. Then he doesn't understand what he has done wrong. But everytime we see each other it is amazing I can't explain it but it is something you try to fight but cannot.
Anyway I saw him on friday night. We were very affectinate with each other as usual. But then he said that he was just messing me around and that we shouldn't see each other for a while. It was the most passionate goodbye I've ever had we just sat kissing each other and holding each other, he even had tears in his eyes.
Now everything in my head says tell him to take a hike and believe me I have tried. But the more I think about it the more sad I get about losing this person. It feels like he could be my soul mate and just because of 4 years we cannot be together.
I should give up I know but I'm not asking for people to tell me that. I know I want to be with him and he wants to be with me but if only he would see that.
Please any advice on what I can do.
Re: stupid man - advise please confused101: We all here have wanted someone who would want to be with us if they could only see it.
Why, if only some rich Hollywood actress would realize that I would be awesome with them if they'd only figure it out. I'm still waiting for that day, but until then they are blind as a bat.
Bottom line...can't make people see or understand anything. I think I would just get a dog.
Re: stupid man - advise please thejoker: the guy is scared.. or he trying to feel out all his options before he "settles" down. some men get scared when it comes to being "tied down".
on the other hand there are guys who just get off making women nutso...
I think it had less to do with age and more to do with maturity. My 60+ yr old uncle still can't commit to anything. My 28 yr old buddy has been married for 8 yrs w/ 4 kids. Everything depends on the individual.
my .02
Re: stupid man - advise please superwife: who says you can't be together b/c of the age difference?
I'm still not sure if i believe in souls mates, but if you feel that, you need to let it go and let him have his time to think. If he really wants to be with you, he'll be bacvkck. In the meantime, don't let him f*ck with your mind.
Re: stupid man - advise please chaotic: [quote author=PnR link=topic=32030.msg323008#msg323008 date=1153747690">
Well after our first date I was really attracted to him and him to me. Well the problem is he is 4 years younger than me. I was hoping it would not be a problem but it has turned out to be as he says he needs to find himself first before getting into a serious relationship.
[/quote">
4 years is really not that big of a difference. To me it sounds as if he is saying "I want to play the field." This way, if he leaves he can say sorry, I told you I wanted to find myself.
[quote">
He has messed me around so much and stood me up so many times since then. Then he doesn't understand what he has done wrong. But everytime we see each other it is amazing I can't explain it but it is something you try to fight but cannot.
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If he is messing around and standing you up like this...He isnt worth it. I know what you are saying about the attraction and wanting to be with him, but it seems that if he is serious about you, he would not be standing you up. Once, ok, something came up. More than that, I would hope he has a good excuse.
[quote">
Anyway I saw him on friday night. We were very affectinate with each other as usual. But then he said that he was just messing me around and that we shouldn't see each other for a while. It was the most passionate goodbye I've ever had we just sat kissing each other and holding each other, he even had tears in his eyes.
[/quote">
I almost want to say this guy sounds like he is addicted to the affection. He wants to not see you, but also wants the affection you give him.
My advice, walk away from this one. He sounds like the type of person that will continue to do this type of thing and you dont need that. Just my 2 cents worth.
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