So stupid!!! gpiilani: I am so pissed at myself for giving him a reason to blame me!!!! All these years, he comes and goes when he pleases, never home for holidays, birthday parties...but wont miss a Seahawks Game!!! Drinks and hangs out at casinos all night long, with guys and girls 5 or 6 years younger....withholds sex from me because he is too "tired" or "stressed" or whatever the hell else he had as an excuse...then gives his cell to women to call him and leave voicemails at 2 am. And when I question him the infamous "I dont know, I didnt ask her to call me". So, after years of all this crap, I try to get some attention from a stupid stranger who is nothing and was nothing....just for fun, curiousity, whatever, laughing at all these poor guys who are on the internet wanting sex. I did not go there looking for sex, I went just to see if men were interested in me, since my husband obviously wasnt. And BAM, he finds out and walks out the door....playing the poor victim. What a stupid, stupid mistake I made....in so many ways. I just played right into his hand....now he has every reason to do all that hes been doing the last 3 years....what an idiot.
Re: So stupid!!! marfanoidus: ok, what is the best way to say this?
hmmmm........
ok, 2 things.
1) If what you say is true, then he isn't participating in your marriage in a healthy capacity. From what you describe, he is a divorce waiting to happen. It sounds like the pros/cons list of the relationship is way off balance. If he never comes back, you may one day wake up and realize you're better off without him;
2) Women need to feel valued, wanted, important, attractive, and emotionally safe. If you read "What Women Want Men to Know" you might find out that what you did was normal. As far as I'm concerned, if a guy fulfills those needs in his woman, she would follow him to the ends of the earth. If he doesn't fulfill them, then there are numerous possible outcomes - but one of them is NOT that she will live happily ever after with him.
Don't be too hard on yourself. Yeah, you regret it, I understand. But my advice to you would be to take a pause, even if he wants to come back it might be in your best interest to say "Actually, I think we need a trial separation". And then you could go to counseling to air this all out, find out why you did what you did. And seriously, please read that book - you will feel validated and normal, not for flirting with another man, but having the needs you have.
And personally, if you have the money, you might want to hire a private detective to follow him around for a while. He has "cheating" written ALL OVER HIM.
Re: So stupid!!! JNA: gpiilani wrote: "I dont know, I didnt ask her to call me".
This is the best one I have heard yet...
LMAO
She must be psychic and know his number...
Too Funny
As far as the rest...
I watch thos pathetic guys on the internet too and it is funny
If you are going to meet someone then meet them in "real" life where it can be "real"...
The Classic starter to a lot of posts I read starts with this
"Well I met them off the internet and..."
BTW...I love posts like yours
He just got burned by his own game...
You can't have your cake and eat it too ya know
Stay Strong
JNA
Re: So stupid!!! gpiilani: Yes, and he tells me I am the one that threw our family and our marraige away, that the only reason why I am sorry now is becasue I realize that I threw away the best thing that ever happened to me. Can you believe that? The worst part about it, is I wont say anything mean or nasty to him because I am trying to be the mature adult here...and because I dont want to hurt him anymore than I may already have. Why do I still care about his feelings???I dont know, especially after he treats me like a slut who would actually go and sleep with an absolute stranger from the internet.
Re: So stupid!!! icwtsmnl: Listen, as painful as this is to hear, he wasn't interested in sex with you because he was already getting it elsewhere. no man says he's too tired or too stressed. You probably already knew this.
and what you did online is NOT what made him leave. he was just looking for an excuse to leave so he could continue banging other chicks and, oh-yay, now he thinks he has a valid excuse for leaving.
fking prick.
i'm so sorry you're going through this. you don't deserve, but OMG, you are SOOOO much better off. once the pain passes, you are well on your way to a life that is way healthier and happier. please trust me on this. hugs.
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