Visiting NYC Ramsey: So I'm on vacation visiting NYC. Seeing family and some friends. I love my parents and I know they love me, but every single word out of my father's mouth makes me feel like crap. I'm going through the worst experience of my life and he thinks he can fix it somehow. My mom listens a little better, but they both have the notion that I should be doing a lot better than I am emotionally.
Luckily a good friend of mine is letting me stay at her apartment in Manhattan while I'm here. If I was forced to stay at my parent's house right now I think I would have killed myself. Seen some family. Seen a friend. Weather's been nice. Walking around NYC has been okay. But I miss being able to talk with people that understand what I'm going through. It's kind of hard seeing all the people some of whom are so happy and with other people.
Re: Visiting NYC spooky: I sympathize with you. My dad is pretty much the same way and mom usually backs him up before it's all done.
Re: Visiting NYC Crystal_Blue_024: Hey Ramsey,
I'm glad your out in NYC visiting friends and family, that's great for you... I understand what you're saying about your parents, especially your dad... My mom seems to do the same thing to me sometimes... She seems to think I should be doing "better" by now.... Somedays she'll see me smilnig and laughing and think I'm "fixed" and then the next day I call her crying, and she doesn't understand why... I was talking to my therapist about this and she explained that it's hard for other people to fully understand our emotions and understand our pain, especially if they've never had a similar situation... You may want to try sitting down and talking to your parents, that's what I did with my mom... Sit down and tell them you lvoe them so much and appreciate all the support they have been giving you... But expplain that this process is a journey of highs and extreme lows, and that you may be fine one day, and totally in the gutter the next, and let them know that you really need their support through all of the ups and downs.. Good luck Ramsey, and try to have some fun in NYC! :)
Re: Visiting NYC superwife: Welcome home Ramsey :).
Ii is very difficult when you're dealing with people who have not been there and done that. I look at my 'happily' married parents, and I know they cannot apreciate what I am going through. And I think they finally realize that. I still get the occasional 'you need to...." like this is so easy!! And I'm sure part if it (like with your dad) is that they don't know what to say. It must be painful for them to see their child going through this, and to be so helpless.
Some days my Dad is more understanding than my mom. i think it has to do with the fact that he is the breadwinner, and I think it hurts him to knw that I have to deal ith all this alone. And he knows that if it were my mom, she would just crumble. My mother is very weak, and sometimes i take after her. I don't want them to see how weak I am at times, but i'm sure they know.
Try to enjoy yourself while you're here. You have decent weather, thank God!! But I'm sure everyone wants to alk to you, see how you're doing and all. Opening up some partially closed wounds, right??
Re: Visiting NYC trapped: Ramsey...Welcome home baby.
Maybe you can do what I do which is never talk about it with my parents. They just dont get it and all that happens is that I get extremely frustrated and feel the need to self-medicate. I find myself defending my ex which is ABSURD!!
Ive 86'd the topic completely off of the acceptable topics list. :-X
Too much misery. :-\
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