Recently abandoned and hurting so much... Ayramayth: My husband and I had been having problems off and on for a couple of months... mainly he would leave with his brother (who lived here with us) and be gone all day into late hours of the night or early morning. I never felt he was cheating, my issue was that he would never ask ME to go with him instead of always taking his brother. I was stuck in the house day in and day out, with our 4 year old son. I have tried talking about this with him a few times, and, he was never very responsive. Even last night when he came home from yet another day gone all day to who knows where, I tried talking to him again. I feel like I had talked about the same thing to him so many times I was blue in the face. And last night I told him that if he couldnt be my husband fully, go to bed next to me every now and then, share a bit of his time with me, than I didnt want it anymore. I told him that I felt like I was living with a roomate, not a spouse. He said he needed to think, and went to take a shower... I fell asleep since I am up with our son every day at 5:30am and we were up so late talking. (Well I was talking, he just sat there.)
When I woke up this morning he was just GONE. He and his brother packed up all of thier clothes in the middle of the night while I slept and had someone come to get them. I dont even know who... he left the car here since it is in my name... and his family isnt talking. I have tried calling all day and his phone is off.... I just, well, I dont know what to do... I have been crying and throwing up almost all day. I should have expected this but it happened and I am SO HURT. He didnt even leave a note. Not even a single word scrawled on a piece of scrap paper. I just woke up this morning alone in bed, and got up and looked around fo him wondering where he was, checked all the rooms a dozen times before it dawned on me that his and his brothers clothes were gone...
I dont know what to do... I just dont know... the thing that makes this even worse is that I have no one... no friends,basically no family. It has always been so hard for me to make friends, and the few I had abandoned me a while ago... and I have basically no family... I feel like I am destined for pain... I have been through so much in my life that even he knew about and I just... please someone, anyone, please.... I dont know what to do or who to turn to or... anything...
Re: Recently abandoned and hurting so much... momuv3: What a coward!!!! You will find on this board that the leavers have thought about this for a very long time. Chances are he was too and was waiting for something to snap. It was possibly you telling him you couldn't do this anymore. It must be very hard to burn the candle at both ends for them. He knew he had to do something and its very sad he chose this over his family.
I know its hard, but you must get your ducks in a row financially. Put things in your name, photocopy important documents etc. You don't know how much he has done already and you need to start thinking of yourself.
I am sorry you are going thru this and post as much as you can. it really does help.
Re: Recently abandoned and hurting so much... sosad05: OMG....I am so sorry! How horrible. Has he done this before? Regardless if he comes back or not, that is so wrong. He is a selfish, selfish mean man. I cant believe he left his son too! Protect yourself. Get an atty. Document everything he's done. Its going to be an emotional roller coaster but we are here for you. And, we understand. ((((((HUGS)))))))
Re: Recently abandoned and hurting so much... Feel: you are at a good place...
But quickly just to get you started... check your accounts... find a lawyer and keep it to yourself... make sure you don't give him your son cause you never know what he has done or gone to and may take him...
HIS family isn't speaking to you????????? something happen? adn why don't you hve friends and family....
Re: Recently abandoned and hurting so much... Ayramayth: We also just bought our first home together 3 months ago... it is only my name on the morgage but I put him on the title as well... he even said at the time "Well I hope so because if you didnt want to I would be pretty worried!"... I just dont know what to do next... I feel like I need to know why but he wnt answer his phone... I dont even know where for sure he is... I only have it narrowed down to a coupe of cities... I am half tempted to go drive and look for him at the old familiar "haunts"... but I dont know if that is wise... I just dont understand why...
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