bleak expectations of future dukey: its been two years of alot of differnet emotions, feelings...i had ups, downs.
right now though, it feels like i will never find anyone. its almost to the point where i expect bad things to happen. you know in life you have even the slightest confidence something good will come? not me, i know what the outcome is, and its always negative. its not that i want it to be, it just always happens that way. i literally feel like everything is meant to be for the worst.
dont get me wrong, i do have alot of good going on for me. i have my health, have a good job etc. its just that i want to get on with my life, and i feel like i will enver find another woman who i can actually get close to, share my feelings with, and spend my life with.
my ex was my first, and i felt like she robbed me of many things including my chance to live my life normally. she manipulated me, tricked me, and eventually left me for another man. i had so many options for other good women, but she convinced me that she needed me, and that i should learn to love her.
any advice would be good, becuase though im over her, i feel like its gonna be a lonely road from here on in.
Re: bleak expectations of future Ayramayth: Well, I cant exactly give advice based on my own life since I am still over my head with my whole situation... but I can let you know about my mother...
That was her same situation when she and my father divorced. He was the same way with her, her 1st, he was very emotionally and mentally abusive as well.
It acctually took her about 2 1/2 years before she finally just threw everything out of her head about him. She said it was the hardest thing she ever did, but she had to start thinking of just herself. She said it was her time to be selfish! So she put up a couple of ads on internet dating sites. She wasnt going out looking for that "special someone", she was just out there and knew it. She said if she was expecting something she would never find it. So she had fun just getting to know people, chatting with them, going out for coffee, just having fun getting to know people. She acctually developed a few very strong lasting friendships out of it. She did date someone seriously for over a year, but, it stagnated and they mutually ended the relationship. She doesnt regret it at all, she says she still had fun, and they are still friends.
I guess what I am trying to say is, if you are looking for that "special someone", it will be alot harder to find what you seek. Just let yourself go, enjoy being you, and have lots of fun doing it!
:)
Re: bleak expectations of future crushedman: OF COURSE will find another woman. For right now, forget about finding your soul mate and think in terms of meeting new people. Hit the gym, get ripped up- then go out and get yourself laid. I'm completely serious. It will help your confidence and you will naturally attract more and more women. Be easy on yourself.. you've been through a lot.
cm
