Am I Wrong? ChrisJane: Okay, be honest with me folks.
First, the ex was told in April he had to pay 1/2 my legal fees and $50 a month towards the $3800 in child support arrearages. Has he NO! He moved to northern OH but no number or address.
Second, a guy pounds >:( on my door last night telling me we had to talk. Okay ??? Seem back in February 2002 my ex bought a butchered beef from this guy and never paid him the $450. This guy is yelling at me that he wants his money.
Lets go to the first problem. My attorney has filed contempt charges to re-open the case to get my ex into court to make him pay his fees and give an address/phone number. I paid all my legal expenses and supported our son for all those months he left me without a dime, why should I let his family make me feel like I'm being greedy, refusing to let it go. I don't want him back, it would be nice to know how to reach him if something were to happen to our son though. He makes my monthly salary in a week so its not like he can't afford to pay up. They have managed to make me feel like I'm nothin more then a greedy B, that is trying to ruin his life. Am I being petty?
Second problem, first this scares me wondering how many large scary men will be pounding on my door looking for their money. This guy was working with my ex's cousin so he sent him to me since I have a good job, that I'd take care of it. Since this was a deal my ex made all those years ago, I paid for the butchering and he was suppose to have paid for the cow, am I wrong in thinking "this isn't my problem" why is this guy coming 2 1/2 years later wanting money? Should I give the guy 1/2 his money since I was married to the guy when this took place not knowing it hadn't been paid for? Should I tell my attorney to see if this falls in the ex's debt? I hate to be petty, but the ex gave most of the meat to his family and drunken friends. WHY should be expected to CLEAN up another mess?
I'm to the point I should just forget the $$$ he owes me, forget having anything so I can pay all his debts. :'(
Re:Am I Wrong? brokenman: You are not wrong. But hate is as much as you will, there will come a point when you are probably better off paying the bill just to get this crap out of your life. I don't think that now is that time though. The guy waited since Feb 2002 to get his money, why the rush now? You paid your share, right? Did the guy at your door know about you and your ex splitting the costs? That might help, but doesn't really change anything. Your ex owes this guy money, not you.
As for the ex-in-laws (does that make them out-laws?), they will think what they will. I wouldn't worry about it too much. I never had to deal with that problem persoanally, but I can feel that boat turning around. Already my ex's family is no longer concerned about how things are going, or wanting my daughter and I to visit anymore. Soon, they will be talking to my ex again and listening to her lies. And even if they don't believe them, they will tolerate them for the sake of Thanksgiving or Christmas. Pretty soon, they will see how I was the evil guy, or at least insensitive and at fault. But that is not my worry. I am who I am and that old crap is nothing to me anymore. They can think of me what they will, it won't change anything.
Your ex is breaking the law. Not to mention, being a giant A-hole to his child. He is not standing on any solid ground. If push comes to shove, I'd not pay his bills, and instead use the money to hire a PI to hunt him down. This guy should be standing in front of a judge begging for mercy rather than smugly ignoring his RESPONSIBILITIES.
You are not wrong.
Re:Am I Wrong? ChrisJane: Thanks Brokenman.
Part of me would rather put the ex in front of a fireing line instead of a judge! The judge was more then blunt the last time telling him he was so close to going to jail for not taking the Parenting Class. Now he still hasn't taken this class or made any of the financial payments. If only the judge could approve a SNIPPING Order to prevent this man from having any more kids to suffer his stupidness. FIVE is enough right!
I've tried to keep the doors open with the ex inlaws for my son, but they have really been pushing buttons so I may have to cool it with the exception of holidays.
The more I stew on the guy showing up 2 1/2 years later for his money, the more I think, I didn't make the deal, the ex was suppose to pay him. This isn't my debt and legally I don't think he can force me to pay it either. The goodness of my heart I could be guilted into it, boy I need to be cold hearted, it would make life easier.
We'll see what happens. The ex's mother should have gotten his court papers today. When my ears start burning and itching I'll know they were delivered.
