email please help translate christincali: please try to decifer if I have a chance I broke up with, this is our last communication 9/6
ME
I was just going through the things that I have of yours at my house and I have some things that I know you are definitely going to need. I did not really got through the folders but I am assuming it is tax information and other records. I did not know the best way to handle getting this stuff to you. Do you want me to just drop it off to Joe and Susan's?
Also I want to make sure you have all the reservations for Joe and Susan wedding and to see if you were still planning on me going?
> >
I also feel I need to explain some stuff. I do not want you to think I am a horrible person for the way I handled things. My feelings for you have not changed. I not only love you but I am still in love with you as well. I wanted to spend forever with you, to have a family, for us to have a life/ But slowly I could see you start to change and push me away and it was killing me. I knew I had to do what was best for me for once. I have tried to be there for you and support you and you will just not let me. I have felt helpless and lost. In a relationship your partner needs to be your best friend and while you were mine, I was not yours.
We go out with friends and I think to myself wow my Matt is back, you are happy grabbing my ass, laughing and making me feel like I want to feel. Then when we are alone there is none of that. I have not been asking for your all because I know right now you do not have it in you to do that. All I have been asking for is for reassurance that we are heading down the right road together (not separately) and you could not give me those answers. So given the circumstances I had to end it and move on. I am not going to lie that I secretly wish that you will hopefully see things the way I see them, but I can't hold on to a dream. I can only believe in myself, my decisions, and god. He will give me the strength and the anwers that I need when the time is right. All I ask of you is to really look at the whole picture of where Matt sees himself in a few years and who the people are that you want to be in that picture and when you get that picture hold onto those people and don't let them go.
x reply
Susan mentioned that you emailed her and that you were going to drop
> stuff off at her house. That's fine, thanks.
>
> As for the wedding, I don't see how that's going to work for us. I
> will split the difference and send you a check for 1/2 of your flight?
> I have the flight, car and hotel info.
>
> As for how I'm doing and how I feel about how things come down. It
> F#cking Sucks. I knew from early on you were the person I wanted to be
> with forever. I love you and I will always love you no matter what
> happens in my life. It's like a terrible tragedy. I am depressed,
> confused and numb about everything right now. I understand how you
> feel and don't blame you.
>
> I just hope that your do what's best in life. That you be careful
> with booze. That you surround yourself with good friends and continue
> to be stronger every day of your life.
>
> I'll be fine, just not happy for a long time.
>
> I just can't believe how this all worked out!
>
> Tell your Mom and Dad I love them and I'm sorry things did not work out!
>
> You know this hurts me just as much as it hurts you, but we both need
> to move on. Make sure you eat, sleep and exercise.
>
> Love Matt :(
My reply
That hurt a lot more to hear then I ever imagined it would. Although
> so much has happened. I am not honestly ready for it to be over forever.
> I just do not think it can work right now. We need to do our own thing.
> We need to figure out what we need. I do not want our relationship
> ruined because of some sucky circumstances that have occurred.
> Anything worth anything in life is worth fighting for. I right now
> need to fight for me and what I need to make me happy and you need to do the same.
> But I can't say that it will never work, is that they way you feel.
ex reply
I'm in shock and don't know what to feel right now. I'm just scared of life without you being alone, depressed and unhappy.
Re: email please help translate vdc_1975: Well, you both say you are still in love with each other. I would seriously consider going to therapy and getting an outside viewpoint to help you guys try and work it out.
GL and God Bless.
Re: email please help translate jannette Garcia: From those emails, i think there might still be a chance.....same thing happened with me and my BF, and now we're back.....he realized over time that he did want to be with me and came back....good luck to you hun
