Why does he want me to fall on my face? sweethome: Ok,
Those of you here probably know my story, some moreso than others. Well, as if he's not been asshole enough, now he has sunk to a whole new level.
I wonder how in the world I ever spent 15 years of my life with this monster. He wants nothing good for me, financially, since he left. He is now threatening to quit his job if any spousal support is awarded, even if it is temporary.
This isn't a new threat, he's done it before. He moved out a month ago, and for the past 2 mornings, I've woken up to him here at the house, outside, here to start trouble. I won't give in to some hairbrained decisions that he wants me to make, and so now, he says "It's ON". OMG - it's been on - for several months.
I tried for months, of living together, to make him not want to leave, to make him want our marriage, and our life together - and those days are past, and the phase of incredible anger has set in. I've done the best I could do to keep life as stable as it could be for my boys, but nothing I ever seem to do is enough. Any choice I make, is wrong in his eyes.
I finally feel like I'm making some progress - emotionally. I've found something in my life that I never expected, and it has been a whirlwind. Anytime I begin to feel like I'm moving forward, he pushes me back down - right where he wants me.
I'm sorry if this post makes no sense, but I've been in quite a state this morning. Thanks for listening
SH
Re: Why does he want me to fall on my face? Fendann: Umm, spousal support is the law in most states...My ex gets it from me, even though I filed against her for Abandonment (she cheated on me, but I didn't want to drag her through the mud)....I had to leave the home, I had to give her over half of everything, she got the kids, she gets support and alimony....because it's the LAW.
In most places, they calculate the amount of spousal support/alimony in this fashion:
--Average his annual income for the length of the marriage (7 years for me, and we figured it was about $20,000 a year)
--Take 30% of that ($6,000)
--Pay it monthly for 33% of the marriage length (~30 months)
--That equals $200 a month
Now, my ex waived 50% of that, so my lawyer wrote it up at $100 per month, but that was HER choice. I had absolutely ZERO say in the matter.
Re: Why does he want me to fall on my face? ATLfoodie: The laws are diffrent in each state, but Lonefather got the gist of it. Not only will you try for alimony, judging the length of time you were married you will probably get it, you will also receive child support. Whether he quits his job or not he will be responsible for paying it. I don't know one judge who would be kind to him for skipping a child support payment.
I know when my first divorce was going on, they took the averag of the past 3 years salary and entered it into a formula to come up with my monthly payment. And it is paid on time. The last thing I would want is to be known as a deadbeat dad. You might want to remind your stbx of this.
Re: Why does he want me to fall on my face? sweethome: Well, I got told to get the kids and get the fuck out of his apartment when I went there today to pick them up.
He's a real peach.
He says if I'm awarded anything other than child support, he will quit his job. Isn't he a loser?
Re: Why does he want me to fall on my face? startingover: Men like this make me sick. My ex is trying to guilt me out of asking for child support by saying he will have to live in his car.
They made their beds. . . .
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