Re:Noooooo.... It's too late!!!! fisherman: In Virginia there is no waiting period for a fault divorce concerning adultery.
She may be serious, but what she asks of me in terms of trust is a little too much. So I ask it of her, I need her to demonstrate over the period of a year or two that she is serious, not just feeling bad because of the situation she now finds herself in... which must be pretty miserable. She knows she can trust me - though she has always had trust issues in the past.
She will need to get over it and put a little faith in me this time for it to work... I will not carry that load on my own. She's picking up the kids from pre-school this evening and I guess plans on talking when she returns them.
Something tells me that her only motive for all of this is to gain a tactical advantage - and I don't want to give up the high ground.
So we'll talk tonight, I'll tell her what she needs to do - and if she's serious she'll either think about it or just say no. Either way I'm not geting hurt again by her. In this way she needs to give me all of her trust, and have a little faith in me to be there for her. She may not be willing to - I'm not counting on it.
Re:Noooooo.... It's too late!!!! cloud: I didn't know you had kids, too.
I've got a 3 year old and it's stuff dealing with all of the divorce stuff and the emotions and then seeing your children in the middle of it all and hoping they aren't too impacted by it all--either short term or long term.
You sound like you're working to put yourself in the best position possible whatever may come. That's smart. She's probably doing the same, so you sort of have to look out for yourself in terms of avoiding pain.
Re:Noooooo.... It's too late!!!! fisherman: I've got a 2 year old, a 4 year old, and a 13 year old step daughter that I have had by default - the mother left me with all of them - then expects to fight in court over it.
I have multiple witnesses to attest to my parenting skills, her lack of, her behaviour, my level headedness, and that's just the beginning.
This case is a slam dunk as far as all of that goes - but you still have a lot of sympathetic mother-oriented judges out there, especially here in the Old Dominion so it's still a gamble.
My kids weren't too affected due to the fact that she worked second shift at the hospital for so long - they never saw her anyway so they haven't missed a beat.
Re:Noooooo.... It's too late!!!! cloud: That's good...in the sense that in terms of your kids that they are faring well and your comfortable in your parenting role.
Judges can be tricky, I bet.
Re:Noooooo.... It's too late!!!! jewel4life: Fisherman I wish my x would call and say he made a mistake. I was use that chance to tell him how much he hurt me. things I have been wanting to say but he would not talk to me. Take that chance to tell her that. Even if you guys got back together could you forgive her? Could you forget each day what she has done to you and the children? And your lives? Think about it. Even though I say I want everything to go back to normal. Normal is not letting someone treat you like crap and taking them back. We are not perfect either but I hate to think what a life like that would be like.
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