I had over a week under my belt then blew it! Trish: I'm so angry with myself. He finally comes over to see the girls. First off it was like 10pm??? He just shows up to surprise them. UH 10PM they were in bed asleep so I guess he got the surprise (((idiot))). Instead of me saying "I'll have them call you" I say "Come On In". I was ridiculous enough to ask how he was doing which got me a whole shit load of information on how he's kinda happy. I don't know what I was expecting a big "TRISH I'm sorry I want to come back I'm miserable?" I don't want him back so why did that bother me that he didn't say it in the first place? 20 years is a hard habit to break I guess. Well he left and it felt like it set me back in my recovery. Big Bad Mistake. He went from an awesome father to "SURPRISE IT'S 10PM AND I'M TOO STUPID TO KNOW YOUR ASLEEP FOR SCHOOL!" Oh brother. And no I did not wake them up. He spent the entire day down here and couldn't seem to put them on the list of a timley visit so I don't feel bad for it.
Well, the "Let's be friends" is not going to work thats for sure. I was doing very well until last night. Now I have to refocus. I do not call him so thank god for that strength.
Not going to invite him in again and not going to ask him any questions on how he's doing. Who cares.
Re: I had over a week under my belt then blew it! Crystal_Blue_024: Don't beat yourself up hun... That's not what you need right now... You made a mistake, yes.... But that's okay... We all slip from time to time... That's all it was a slip up... Now pick yourself up and start again... You can do this! :)
Re: I had over a week under my belt then blew it! sosad05: Definitely dont beat yourself up. You're entitled to slip-ups. I think the best policy is to keep it "business cordial"-that is how I handle my XH. Even if your XH was unhappy at this point, he probably wouldnt admit it. So, you have to do the same. Hang in there! Its an emotional roller coaster ride but you WILL get through it. It just takes time. (((HUGS))))
Re: I had over a week under my belt then blew it! icwtsmnl: well, you DID get something out of it. an important lesson for yourself, which was that you can't be friends with him. at least not now. any way to learn that would have been painful. it's uphill from here.
(and by the way, don't necessarily be fooled by his "my life is great, I'm so happy" front)
Re: I had over a week under my belt then blew it! drowned: [quote author=icwtsmnl link=topic=36051.msg383372#msg383372 date=1160758528">
well, you DID get something out of it. an important lesson for yourself, which was that you can't be friends with him. at least not now. any way to learn that would have been painful. it's uphill from here.
(and by the way, don't necessarily be fooled by his "my life is great, I'm so happy" front)
[/quote">
Well said icw....
Trish...you did not make a mistake AT ALL. You answered a question I am sure that has been on your mind for quite sometime now....right?
chin-up
drowned
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