Boyfriend & childs father =no marriage wallflower: I have been with a man that is the father of my 5 year old for 8 years. I recently told him that I am ready for marriage. To my dismay, I was told to sign a prenuptual agreement. The house & his semi are in his fathers name but he pays the payments...LONG STORY! But the man makes about 3000.00 a week, to which I could care aless about. I own my own business as well, to which I don't need his money. Upon further finding out that he doesn't want to marry at all. To me or anyone because he isn't ready for it. His exwife in the divorce got everything, and he walked away with his clothing. Now he feels like every girl is out to take him for everything. To which I am not. I just wanted to be able to tell my friends, grandchildren...etc..that I have been married for 25 years. I guess I feel like I am stupid for even being in this situation to ask others for help. I feel like if I can't be married, then whats the point for wasting my energy with someone that doesn't want to be with me. I was in a nasty divorce previously also, but I have gotten over it and want to start a new life. Should I start a new life on my own..
Some advice would help
Thanks
Re: Boyfriend & childs father =no marriage Rain_Gray: Honey honey honey.... marriage isn't everything. Technically if you two have been living together for 8 years, you're already common-law. My parents have been together for 25 years and have never been married.
Not only that, but what's the big deal of signing a prenup? If you have more to lose than he does, then you should be greatful that he's willing to sign a prenup. I know that it makes it seem like he doesn't trust you, but no one can predict the future, and he's been burned before. He's just covering all his bases, and if he needs you to sign a prenup in order for himself to feel secure, why not just sign it and forget about it.
Now, you two have been together for 8 years and you have a child together, it sounds like there might be more going on that would make you want to leave.
My suggestion would be marriage counselling, explain to him that you don't need to be married to go through marriage counselling. He is scared, and after what he went through previously, its completely understandable. But if you are ready to take a major step forward and he isn't, then you need to work that out or move on. Just make sure that you're leaving for the right reasons if you leave.
Good luck.
