Question about your "weekend off"... Fendann: Here's the story...my question is at the bottom.
My ex and I switched weekends so I could go to the Ojar meet this past weekend...We agreed that I would take the kids for the next two weekends, just to even things out and get back to our schedule.
She called me Saturday and said that she had to work that evening, and asked me if I could come get the kids Sat night through Sun. No problem, I said. As I make it back into the States and almost to her apartment, she calls me back and says that her parents called at the last minute and said they would take the kids...ok, that's fine.
Well, I made plans to go out with a friend, and the ex gets all irate. She tells me that I am neglecting my fatherly duties because I didn't tell her parents that I would take them instead, blah blah blah.
Now, like I said before, we had agreed that she would take the kids for this weekend, and I would take them the next two...so, my question is as follows...
What does it matter what I do on my weekend away from the kids? Also, when you make an agreement to switch weekends (like we did), if your plans get cancelled, should/would you change your children's plans and go pick them up, even if they're already set and taken care of for the weekend?
This really has me at a loss for words...regardless of how much I try to think about it and rationalize her voice on the matter, I can't get it to make sense...though I really think jealousy is playing a big role here...
Re: Question about your "weekend off"... tara: It doesn't matter what you do on your "off" weekend (with obvious criminal exceptions). But if you want to go to a bar with friends, stare into space, have a casual fling, play basketball, attend a seminar on the earned income tax credit -- that's your business, not your ex's.
If you switch -- depending on what hardship your ex went through to accommodate the switch, it may be "nice" if you call and ask if she wants you to take them, but it's no means required and may even cause its own hardship (especially if, as you say, they've already got plans).
Re: Question about your "weekend off"... allilm: Sounds like there's some miscommunication going on. If she called you to say her parents were taking the kids, why would she then expect you to still come to pick them up?
Re: Question about your "weekend off"... Fendann: Because the way she's looking at it says that it was still MY weekend with the kids...as if she was doing me a favor or something by taking them for the weekend and giving them to me next weekend...Even until the fight ended last night, she still insisted that this past weekend was MY weekend...then she threatened to take them away from me next weekend...
I told her that my lawyer would be contacting her with the custody battle paperwork....
Re: Question about your "weekend off"... allilm: Once you get this settled, maybe you should put in writing and have both of you sign it, every time you agree to switch weekends. So there's no confusion over what was agreed upon.
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