Am I obligated? flyaway: Ok. I ended up going to a club on Friday night with a girlfriend. She had just broken up with her *very bad for her* boyfriend this past week, and needed to get out. We got there, and right from the get-go, were laughing, and dancing, and generally having a great time. btw, Raspberry Vodka is teh yum!
*ahem* alright. There was this guy there, tall, nice smile, joined my gf and me at our table. He was from out of town, and well, looked lonely. But we started talking, and laughing, and then he asked to dance. OK. so we go out there. Now, this is a "shake that thang" sorta place, not a hold your partner close and move together sort of place.
he started getting a bit more ummmm, brave? And you know...well, kinda started bumping and grinding...alright, I may have been a bit buzzed, and enjoying the music....and so kinda got into it, right?
He even stole a kiss. Well, around 12:30am, my gf and I decided it was time to leave. I turned to him and said goodnight, and he got this stunned look in his eyes. And tried to argue me outta leaving....nicely of course.
I, at this point, was pretty aware that he had ONE thing on his brain, and I wasn't going to help him with that, so I pretty much ran away. *at least I didn't WANT to help him with that* ::)
But well, my question is: if I'm behaving that way with someone at the bar, am I obligated to offer my number to him? Or even go "home" with him? Did I break some sort of unwritten rule, that if you flirt with and kiss a guy, you NEED to go further?
I'm sorry if this sounds stupid and naive, but I don't do the bar scene. I guess I just want to know for next time.
Flyaway
Re: Am I obligated? BobFromAcctg: NO OBLIGATION... PERIOD!!!
The most important thing is that you are always able to look yourself in the mirror in the morning, and have no regrets.
So, if you didn't feel comfortable giving a phone number - don't. He is a big boy and he will find someone else.
Just my opinion
The Bobster.
Re: Am I obligated? Whirlpool: You aren't obligated girl, but I would be a little confused/surprised as well. If you were interested enough to hang with me, bump and grind a little (even after I "stole" a kiss from you) and all that I would think you were interested enough to exchange numbers. You will do all that but you don't want to talk on the phone with me? :P But this is not about him, if you wanted a good time with zero strings attached to it then that is your business and yours alone.
Really though, of course you are not obligated, but I would think I at least just met someone I had a good time with and maybe could again sometime. I would get over it though, so will he.
Re: Am I obligated? flyaway: ummm, he would have to ask me for my number, wouldn't he? :P
I would have given it to him in a heart beat. He was just my type. Except, being the jaded divorcee I am, I did think, well, you're from out of town, eh? How convenient. I didn't say this out loud, however.
Re: Am I obligated? jetguy: flyaway,
Any respectable guy would have enough balls to get your number if he thought about taking it further especially after how things progress as your described.
Go home with him??? Come on, is that how you want to tell friends/family how you met? Let's see I went to this club, saw a guy, motioned him over, we talked, we dance, we bumped and grind, I took him home, had sex...and the rest was history.
Chalk it up as just a fun night and walk away knowing you can still attract the opposite sex!
JR
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