Now I know its over Hopeless: I got a call from my XW last night where she wanted to read me a letter. It was her feelings toward me. Basically it says that I have done all the wrong things while we were getting divorced (she wanted). And that I need to stay out of her life. I am not really in her life, but we do have 2 kids and have been together for 13 years.
My question is, why was it so important for her to share her feelings with me. I know what she thinks of me and our relationship. We talk more now about our feelings than we did while we were married. I explained to her last night that all we are missing is the fact that we live in separate houses, and have not been intimate in over a year. Not since she left.
What am I supposed to do here. Hang on, I know I have to go no contact, thats for sure. But why would she feel so compelled to write me a letter and then call to read it too me? Does she feel some connection that I should be aware of?
Sorry, just rambling here. I still love her and would love to get my family Whole again.
Re: Now I know its over grendalkhan: YOu and me both.
Re: Now I know its over Feel: I can't say I know why she wrote it... but it sounds to me from what you discribed, she is feeling a little guilty and wants to put that back on you!
You guys have kids as I do with my ex, and no matter what I will have to see him the rest of my life... I am so angry at him and I could read him a book if I had the time to write it.....
But also, I just think that she wants something from you but doesn't know how to tell you, she wants you to not be around but yet the contacts you because she doesn't know how to let go....
Sometimes women can be unsure of the choice of leaving was the right thing, maybe she wants to come back but she is doing everything to see your changes and one thing could strike her and she feels the need to tell you about everything you did wrong when you were together.... In hopes that you can become consistant with your changes....
:-\
Have you tried to maybe date her now or is it a complete no no...
Re: Now I know its over Hopeless: She is very clear that she "cannot find the love" for us. So dating is out of the question. She is very angry with me most of the time, and tries to sabotage phone conversations to start an argument. Sometimes it works. She is very cold and shallow with me. There are a number of weird things that she does in the name of protecting my feelings that i just dont understand, but I have learned to live with.
I know somewhere deep in my heart that we had a chance, and perhaps in 6 months, a year, 10 years....who knows. But we will look at each other and regret the time apart. I get so angry knowing that I will have to get to that point only to look back with regret.
We communicate nearly every day about one thing or another.
I really need to end the communication with her. I have tried just not answering the phone, but we do have kids and I dont want it to seem that I dont have time for them.
aaaarrrrrgh, I am just so confused!
Re: Now I know its over Mo: Sometimes people will obsess in their minds, things that should be done and gone but, because we didn't way what we wanted, do as we wanted at the time, etc...it ends up like a whinny toddler that won't go away. I know that I have found that if something is bothering me, it just can't be ignored, even though it was a past thing. To me it is like clearing my mind of the guilt of not saying exactly what I wanted and felt at the time. I see it more of a clearing of the slate, saying it and getting it over with. Do I make any sence?
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