Things I shouldn't have done Perryilz: I am a Marine and I am currently in Japan. My wife and I got married early, she was 18 and I was 19, and we had a little girl on the way. I thought everything was fine until about a year and a half ago we got into this really big fight. My daughter was staying with her grandmother while my wife finished high school. My wife and I began to fight, and after a while she left with the car. I was still furious and had no one to talk to so I went to the kitchen and grabbed a knife. I began slicing our couches that my mother-in-law had given to us. I cut a piece of material that had my wifes baby picture on it, they don't sell those anymore. I poured orange juice all over her pictures of her passed grandmother, and other childhood pictures. I broke things that belonged to her that her passed grandmother had given to her before she passed. I don't remember if that was all I destroyed, but I do remember her coming home, and me leaving as soon as she walked in the door. Currently I was on night crew and I needed to get to work. I told my chain of command about the whole thing, and I was removed from the house. What I didn't know is that when my wife left with the car, she called her mom. Her mom in turn called the police department. Because I am on a military installation, the military police were called. So when I went back to get a few things so I could stay at a friends house, my house was full of police. I made my statement and got a few changes of clothes and left. About a week later, I was allowed to move back in with my wife, if my wife so desired. She did, so I did immediatly. We were talking and she wanted a divorce. I talked her out of it, and told her that I would change my attitude. I asked for her forgiveness and she said that she would. About four months ago, my wife and I got into an arguement. She was walking away from me while we were in the driveway of her mothers house. Some of her family members came out onto the porch. She stopped to see who came out, and I didn't stop, but I still looked to see who came out. I ran into the back of her causing her to stumble. Her brother saw what he thought was me pushing her. He came out and proceeded to get into my face. I pushed him to get him out of my face and he came at me again. He is 6'2" and weighs about 160lb. I am 5'7" and weigh about 125lb. I felt threatened. I punched him in the stomach, and again through the face. At this point the fight was broken up. Later on, cops were called and I was arrested and charged with assault and battery and domestic violance. I was released from the jail, and went through court, in which they threw out the assault and battery. I had to go to anger management classes as soon as I got to Japan. Again, I went to talk to my wife about what happened and what went wrong, and she wanted a divorce, again. I talked her out of it, again, and we had a good time for the next month, in which from that time I have been here in Japan. Just last Monday, 30 October, she told me that she wanted a divorce and that she didn't ever love me from the first incident, that she never forgave me of the first incident. She says that she don't want to be married, she found out since I have been here she doesn't need my help with our kids. She won't talk to a marraige counselor because she doesn't want to work it out, I offered to go with her to a marraige counselor before I left and she turned down the offer. She gets mad at everything I do now. It seems as if there is nothing I do is ever going to be right. She has told me that there is no way out of this divorce. But she has told me for the past year and a half after our first major fight, that she would never leave me, she would always love me, and that she couldn't ever love anyone else. What do I do? I feel there was some love there for that year and a half, or would she really say those things. She knew I was coming out to Japan for a year, do you think she waited everything out so that leaving would be easier on her as well? Or do you think there is truely no feelings for me from her? I think I have told everyone all the basics of my story, if you have any further questions please, ask.
Re: Things I shouldn't have done idocsteve: Perry,
You destroyed her precious heirlooms, sliced up her furniture with a knife, knocked her down in the street, and beat up her brother. She's probably scared of you, and what you might be capable of. Let her go, and work on yourself and your anger management issues. Perhaps she will come back to you someday but don't count on it. You've caused more than enough problems for both of you.
Re: Things I shouldn't have done kN3eLb4Z0d: Once again, Steve hath called it. It's back to the drawing board for you, sir.
Re: Things I shouldn't have done allmusic76: I don't want to sound like a dink.... but read what you just wrote.
If you ever have another chance with this woman, you need to focus on you. You need to let her go, see a counselor or specialist and work out these issues.
If you believe in fate, luck, chance, etc.. then maybe you two will get another shot.... but I would be thankful that you got off as light as you did. Maybe this was a huge message to you, and in the end.... the cost is losing her for you to learn a very valuable lesson.
