Re: when you're over it big_daddy: I've taken the high road through this entire journey, refused to sink to her level. It doesn't mean I'm over it though.
It simply means she isn't worth the effort, because there is no "getting even"...I couldn't hurt her that bad if I tried.
Re: when you're over it allmusic76: Good point... I think that goes back to the whole... "the person who cares the least has the most power" thing...
If they dont care us much, there is no way you could ever have an equal "revenge"..... Life really is that crazy sometimes.
Re: when you're over it katbuttkid: This is exactly why I mentioned to Erf that The Right thing is usually NOT the "thing that makes you happy" or "what you deserve"
I am so SICK of hearing those two phrases being doled out as advice. They have a time and place. Yes. If a person is being beaten, or their character tarnished, or thei self-esteem trashed, sure... they need to remember to take care of themselves. It's good to remember to be happy.
But you're right allmusic, iti's such an All About Me society these days. The couples that make it are either not in tune or they are good at stuffing feelings, or they switch off who's year it is to be all about themselves.
And the AllABoutMes are pepople who want it all usually too.
Ugh.
Anyway, this thread was originally about noticing you're over it by not caring to get even any more.
I still think even those who have the moral character to NOT get even, if they are THINKING about getting even, or wishing they could, or are biting their tongues, or Taking a high Road... it's the same thing. But i'm loose in my analyzation of what that quote means. That is what it means to me....
You know you're over it, when the oppotunity to get even is a non-issue.
When interactions or non interactions can happen, and you deal with the X spouse like they are any other person.
Tree
Re: when you're over it allmusic76: Tree... you are the bomb.
[quote"> [/quote">
This is exactly why I mentioned to Erf that The Right thing is usually NOT the "thing that makes you happy" or "what you deserve"
[quote"> [/quote">
I firmly believe that most of the time, the right thing to do is the harder thing to do. If you find yourself saying, I don't want to do that... then it's often the right thing to do, because it requires more effort and harder work.
"Do what makes you happy"
I agree that in life we should strive to enjoy life, but NOT at the expense of others. Not when it is done in a selfish manner that results in the abandonment or alienation of another person.
Lol, call it a strange comedy of errors, but I think I will be over the person who hurt me long before I am over the fact that I was hurt.
Re: when you're over it drowned: Just a thought here....but why would we focus so much energy on what happened to the ex or what is currently going on with the ex? I say this because if you ARE completely healed, over them, whatever... it should not matter....Am I off base here? I suppose I should stress also that with kids involved I know between the two people, it is kind of hard not "too know or wonder" after all....you have to communicate with them somewhat at a distance.
Hmm...I guess I am speaking on the notion of not having kids like myself and not giving a crap :-\
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