Is this messed up or what avoj: Well my friend is seeing an older woman. I watched her make out with her halloween night at a party, after I asked her along time ago not to rub it in my face.
Ive been so hurt since we crossed boundarys I havent been the nicest person. It's just that she broke the trust. SHe hurt me so bad. She had my heart. How else am I supposed to act? I told her yesterday (cause she didn't come home Friday night. spent the night with her new g.f) that I feel indifferent, cold, uncaring towards her now and that I am emotionally drained. That she attached herself to me during a bad time in her life. I gave her what she needed then. Now she's moving on and I'm stuck with a big broken heart.
Last night we went to dinner, played games and watched a movie at the house. It feels so good when I am with her. I have so much fun with her, even it's just the two of us in a room not even talking. Just being with her has made me so happy.
This really sucks!!! I really don't deserve this. I gave to much. She took it. SHe told me that is what friends do for each other. Not to the extent I went to with her. Not spending 24-7 together, either it be talking on the phone for hours or just being together. I am so sad. Just looking at her makes me want to explode. SHes beautiful and the best personality ever.
Its sad really. Just 2 weeks ago she told me she wasn't interested in dating anyone. Then all of a sudden she says after last sat (halloween) she is ready now to date. I guess this woman must have "knocked her socks off." Nice to know they are already having sex after the first date.
Just this last wed (she alrady had the date with this woman but didnt tell me she was dating, I sorta figured it out on my own) When I asked her about it she said yeah would you be upset if this woman asked me out and I said yes. I said of course it would, ect I told her to date. She said well she is going to date. I said whyh didnt you metion it to me. She said b.c she was uncomfortable telling me about it. IT turned into a huge mean thing via email. SHe kept saying I will back out of the date if you want so as not to ruin what we have built. I told her no to date. SHe said that several times. My thought was we are never dated, why would you stop for me.
On tuesday before i found out about the date. She said she was looking forward to celebrating christmas with me. That we could get a queen size air bed and sleep in front of the tree together and get matching wreaths to put on our cars and decorate. Blah!!!!! ***?? DO you do **** like that with your friends? Especially friends you know are in love with you
YOu know since she moved in we have cuddled in bed together quite a bit. Now I dont want her touch me.
