My son's crying...again... alonewith2: I tucked the kids in bed and kissed them goodnight like every night. But as I'm walking out of the room I hear my son say, "Step lies." He remembers how Step promised to come pick him up and take him back to his apartment to play the Playstation together. And he remembers that months have passed and his step never came...and he remembers every other Sunday asking his Step if he was still going to do that with him, and how every time he asks his step says of course...
I didn't realize this was going on still. He hasn't said anything to me about it until tonight. I don't eavesdrop on their conversations on those Sundays when my stbx comes to drop off our daughter. And this really breaks my heart that the ass is still hurting my son after all this time!
I tried to explain to my son that people aren't perfect, and that sometimes they promise things even when they have no intentions of fullfilling those promises because they don't want to hurt the other person's feelings. Usually it hurts more to handle things that way (as he realizes with his own heartache) and that's why we should never lie or promise things to people if we don't think we can carry them out.
I explained to him that step has his own life now, a new girlfriend, a new apartment, etc. That the only times he'll be coming over is every other Friday to pick up his sister and every other Sunday to drop his sister off...just like his own dad does. I told him that I was sorry that he doesn't have that relationship with his step anymore that he used to. And then I didn't know what else to say...
What else is there to say? I feel like calling up my stbx and bitching him out, but what is that gonna solve? All he'll do is spend an afternoon with him and then go back to being the disappearing stepdad again. What good will that do my son?
:'( >:( :'( >:(
Re: My son's crying...again... Alphabet Girl: That's heartbreaking. How sad. And how hard would it be to get your son for a weekend when he gets your daughter here and there? Ugh...
Re: My son's crying...again... alonewith2: [quote author=Alphabet Girl link=topic=37614.msg405613#msg405613 date=1163986548">
That's heartbreaking. How sad. And how hard would it be to get your son for a weekend when he gets your daughter here and there? Ugh...
[/quote">
My son goes to his dad's the same weekends my daughter goes to hers...so he'd have to give up one of his "free" weekends to come get my son. The plan was for him to come get him once in awhile during the week for a few hours...but that never happened. It's only been a year.. ::)
Re: My son's crying...again... Alphabet Girl: Okay, I was thinking that while I was posting, but I wasn't sure. That's just a bad situation all around. My sister was a step parent - and when she got divorced she made sure to stick around even though she had no legal rights (and her ex husband let her, which I know is factor, too). Too bad not everyone can be that way. I hope your son gets past that soon.
Re: My son's crying...again... alonewith2: My stbx and I started dating when my son was 6 months old. He's 8 now. It's like losing a dad to him. :(
I had this fight with him when we were separated the first time for a little over 1 1/2 years. This final separation has been about 1 1/2 years, too. I don't have the fight in me anymore. He isn't going to change. He's too preoccupied with his new life. He probably would forget his daughter, too, if he could get away with still looking like father of the year without seeing her...
