'Absolute Truth'? madmax: Haven't posted in a while...been doing pretty good.
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My stbx called me for the first time in 6 months a few days ago. Caught me offguard for sure. The discussion went from 0 to 100 in about 2 seconds. I let her have everything that has emotionally built in me since she left. I think it's important that she knows exactly what she did...because it was 100% her decision to leave...no disputing that fact.
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But...I have an interesting topic to discuss here:
What is TRUTH?
As my ex talks to people...and as your ex talks to people...they are 100% correct in their mind. To them, their thoughts are clear...black and white so to speak...and the people they talk to believe them just the same.
In our minds, our thoughts are clear as well...except we see things as white and black.
I guess what I'm trying to say is...it's weird to think there are 2 correct sides to these types of situations. To her...she's 100% correct in what she thinks; to me...I'm 100% correct.
So...where does the truth lie? Somewhere between? I'm all about honesty...and am very interested in absolute truth.
Thoughts on this?
Re: First contact since separation...'Absolute Truth'? thejoker: there is no truth... there is only perspective. which is exactly what you said.
Re: First contact since separation...'Absolute Truth'? madmax: [quote author=TheJoker link=topic=38532.msg419145#msg419145 date=1165602960">
there is no truth... there is only perspective. which is exactly what you said.
[/quote">
True...but...
...there is a lot of truth in perspective. For example, my ex and I had monies set up to EFT into our bank account before separation. The EFT didn't occur until after separation. Immediately after the monies hit our joint account, she withdrew her portion. No problem.
3 weeks later, her atty contacted my atty and asked for me to send her portion by check...even though she had already withdrawn it.
I don't see much room for a difference of perspective on this one...this is definitely a truth vs untrue item.
My atty sent her atty this email a few days ago on an unrelated issue:
Attached are statements for both the joint bank account and (Madmax)'s bank account. The next time you speak with (stbx), can you get her to identify the transactions she thinks are suspicious? Once before (stbx) had told you that (Madmax) took her ($$$) and we produced one of these bank statements along with her signed withdrawal slip to show you that she had in fact withdrawn her ($$$) from the joint account. Too often a spouse has a need for an unqualified rejection of all of her feelings for the other spouse and she reinforces her emotional decision to divorce by seeing everything he does in the worst light possible. That is when facts get distorted. We are trying our best to avoid that so we would certainly appreciate your questions while there is time to find the proof.
So again I say...isn't there one 'absolute truth'? The fact that her mentality won't even acknowledge her 'factual' actions on the above situation, doesn't it appear that there is the possiblity of 'absolute truth' on other issues in a separation? Can perspective be wrong?
I say "yes"
Re: First contact since separation...'Absolute Truth'? athena: I had a thread about this once awhile back called "Is it all the other person's fault?" because it's true.. everyone thinks their ex is 100% wrong and they are 100% right... and vice verse.
I definately think that in most cases, it's a 50-50 thing. If you are getting divorced you should look at yourself and how you may have contributed just as much as them. Regardless of who left who.
Re: First contact since separation...'Absolute Truth'? icwtsmnl: [quote author=athena link=topic=38532.msg419183#msg419183 date=1165605677">
I definately think that in most cases, it's a 50-50 thing. [/quote">
no. my ex is 100% wrong. period. :)
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