He disappeared into thin air... tryingtosmile: My husband seems to have disappeared into thin air. If I didn’t know better, I would think he died. I know that no contact is good for my sanity and emotional health, and I’m not planning on contacting him, but it’s so hard! I guess in my heart I didn’t think he would close the door so firmly behind him. When he left, he really left. He hasn’t called once since leaving (6 weeks ago) and I received only the briefest and most formal of emails in the very beginning (and that was mostly because his father died 2 days after he left me). I don’t understand how they can just leave and forget your very existence. I wasn’t expecting him to be in any kind of constant contact, but considering he did leave me in a foreign country, I hoped he might have some sort of remorse and at least check on me to see how I am doing..(yeah, foolish hope, I know). I don’t even have an address or phone number to contact him in case of an emergency. It seems like most people on here hear from the leavers from time to time..in some form or another. How can he just wipe 10 years from his heart and mind? Doesn’t he have any sort of conscience? I feel like I imagined or dreamed our entire relationship and marriage. Maybe I am just emotional because of the holidays, or because I’m a million miles from nowhere, but I am having a hard time coping with the fact that my husband, best friend, and lover could just pull up roots so suddenly and transplant himself to a place where I apparently am only a figment of his imagination. One day he was so…here…and the next day….so very gone. Poof! :'(
Just wanted to get that off my chest because I’m feeling a little sad tonight…thanks for letting me share and if anyone has any tips for dealing with this, feel free to share!
Re: He disappeared into thin air... cdoulatiff: I didn't hear from my exH for 3 weeks after he left, had no idea where he was or what was going on......and we have 2 babies.....so I definitley understand your frustration. I don't have any good advice though.....:( sorry....
((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Re: He disappeared into thin air... chaotic: One of the most interesting things about no contact is that at first we stop contacting them because of the pain we feel when we talk to them. But once they stop contacting us, we feel pain because they dont talk to us.
Strange, but you are not alone. Sadness is natural and pain is weakness leaving the body.
Dont beat your self up for feeling sad or weak. Just remember we are here to listen
Re: He disappeared into thin air... ebl: trying, believe me, I understand.
My stbx husband hasn't contacted me for 8 months. Nothing at all, after a 10 year marriage. I am very hurt and disturbed by this myself. Just don't see who's giving him the support to behave this way...
When he suddenly walked out on his marriage, I got served with divorce papers a week later. Just to think of it, we went to the movies a week before that incident. :-\
I would have never imagined that my husband would treat me this way either. I really thought I had a good marriage where anything can be communicated. I guess not. It makes me so angry that I was fooled for 10 years. Sometimes I question myself - is my life so unimportant that he can just walk out suddenly and not care about me?
I dont' know, tryingtosmile. Human psychology is so damn complicated.
Re: He disappeared into thin air... 2be: Don't mean to trivialize your pain, but I would have MUCH preferred my X never contacting than have to deal with drunken 3am "i'm so sorry..." phone calls. I would get a stab of panic the moment my phone rang for a month, wondering if it was her.
I know it hurts because they seem to have closed the door, but really.... it is a blessing in disguise. You are able to move on with your life without dragging your X's crap behind you. Take it and run!
Click More for the next page.
