Re: Why is it? Cheri123: I most certainly agree...speaking as a nice person who confused nice with "wanting to be liked and loved". I wanted to be loved, and I felt the best way to receive love was to give it. Unfortunately, I had to learn to give tough love. I used to let people in my family and so called friends use me in so many ways because I didn't know how to say "no" I didn't value my time, I put other people's needs ahead of my own and then felt really bad when no one would do the same for me. I also did this with my ex. I always put his needs and wants over my own. When I finally learned to respect myself...he called me selfish and mean. I'm still nice, but I've learned not to let people take advantage of me. I'm still learning how to not let people take advantage of me. Old habits are hard to break.
Re: Why is it? cdoulatiff: [quote author=chaotic link=topic=39525.msg433101#msg433101 date=1167929832">
It all depends on how you define "nice".
Being nice means being agreeable, being willing to listen to peoples' opinions, ideas, etc...
Being nice means being willing to compromise during conflicts, being willing to help people when they need it
Being nice does NOT mean bending over backwards to please someone.
Being nice does NOT mean being overly agreeable
Being nice does NOT mean kissing someone's a$$ just to make them think you are nice.
I think too many times, I thought I was being nice when in reality I was being weak. Being weak and being nice are not the same thing but seem to be often confused. I have found that I can be nice without being weak. So no more Mr. Weak-Guy for me.
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amazing post!!!!!!
