Re: Why is there nobody willing? Melbel: I have been thinking and praying for you as well. True we are not there in real life but you have an amazing amount of people here who think about you and pray for you and your family.
Hugs,
Melissa
Re: Why is there nobody willing? PennyLane: well for what ever it's worth, at 39 I was forced to make all new friends and did. When I divorced most of my husbands friends over the years had become my good friends. When he left, it was like he took them with him.
I'll be thinking of ya and wish you well. Maybe on one of your days off you can hook up with a buddy.
Re: Why is there nobody willing? ashamaliedarn: C hunny..i don't work until 12:30 tomorrow, (1:30 your time) you should send me a message or hop online so i can give you a buzz before hand.
you know i'd be there in a heartbeat if i had the money ... i feel soo horrible that i can't be there for you. i know this is rough. but know that anytime you need me, i will be there, just a phone call away.
lovies. the smash
Re: Why is there nobody willing? shegie: Hi there. I'm really sorry about your mom. (I know you have no idea who I am, but i'm a friend of a friend ;)) My father died almost 5 years ago and I felt like I was in a vacuum. Everyone around me was bright and colorful, and I was stopped in time. As I look back, I realize that that's the way it's supposed to be. It's so incredibly painful to lose someone you love - but when it's a parent, you feel even worse. I felt abandoned and alone and lost - even though I knew it was coming. There are still days when I'm fine and all of a sudden, something will trigger a memory and I'm in tears. All I can say is that it does get better. The year of firsts is the hardest, and there will always be events that will trigger the pain, but time does heal the wound. There really are no words that will ever heal your pain - that comes from within. Keep getting out of bed every day - go through the motions even if it feels fake. Go to class, go to a movie, go to a restaurant, go anywhere there are people. You said that you have friends-go where they are. Tell them you don't want them to fix it, but you just want to be with them. Hug someone - sometimes a hug is worth far more than words. Just don't stop - you are alive. never stop living. Two cents from a stranger :)
Re: Why is there nobody willing? superwife: I am sorry about your mom. I can't imagine what that feels like (although it has been on my mind lately, as I am realizing how many friends I have that have recently lost parents).
To answer your question, i honestly feel people stay away when they do not know what to say or how to react. And death seems to do that to a lot of people. it's an awkwardness. Almost the same awkwardness as....say.....a divorce!!!! I don't know how long you are apart from your ex, but perhaps there are people who just cannot deal with the hand you've been given. Even for me, after losing a brother to suicide, i still feel weird sometimes around people who have lost loved ones. And believe me, i felt a ton of isolation after my brother died, as well as weirdness from those close to me.
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