Re: Forgiveness gdgross: Part of me thinks that I really have to forgive her if I ever want to truly move on. As long as I keep the bitterness and anger, I really am still tied up with her. I still think about her a lot, just in an angry/self-righteous kind of way instead of a loving kind of way.
I don't think it has anything to do with her apologizing or asking me to forgive her. I think it's a process/choice/whatever tha I have to go through myself, whether she cares or not.
I also feel like I will never be able to truly give all my attention to another until I have moved on from the ex. Should I marry again, which at some point I would like to, how could I truly give my wife all of myself if I am still angry at my ex?
All that stuff I believe, I just don't know how to get there yet.
Re: Forgiveness chaotic: Try thanking your ex.
Thank them for causing you the pain that has helped shape a better and stronger you.
Thank them for showing you what to look out for in the rest of your life
Thank them for releasing you to live your life for yourself
The catch 22 with forgiving to move on is that as you move on, it becomes easier to forgive, but it you feel you cant move on until you forgive...it may be a long wait.
Re: Forgiveness ibelong2me: In my situation I did forgive my stbx when he had the affair..I stayed in my marriage and thought we were working things out because I for one believed in the commitment of marriage. And even with me forgiving he still left me down the road. But I have forgiven him even for that. It wasn't easy at first but I try with most things in life not to hold on to that anger for long because it's only a waste of my energy. Forgiving and trying to move on is the best healing. (I know tell me to shut up :)
Re: Forgiveness tripny2k6: Im not going to forgive strictly bc I really dont give a shit anymore. :-)
Re: Forgiveness MadorSad: I go aginest the grane here, I say F the forgiveness. Just walk away there is no reason you can not have a happy relationship with another person.... I will not just forgive some one just because it is cleansing my soul.... That my friend is B.S. of the highest order..... If you have kids it might be diffecult but, you do not have to forgive to move on....
Has she asked for your forgiveness or done anything to show you that she is sorry for what she put you through ??? if not F it and move on....... Most will tell you this will not work but, I been OK with it for 3+ years 8)
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