Can someone teach me how to be single? Cheri123: Okay I know this sounds like a stupid question, and being single isn't something that is normally taught, its something that you just happen to be when you don't have a partner. But after being married for ten years and divorced for two years, I find it hard to be single.
I've been seeing an SO...I guess that is what he is, since I exclusively see him for more than a year now. But he still doesn't take me around his family. Is this normal? Or have I just been married for so long that I don't know the do's and the don'ts.
Ok so there is another caveat to this relationship...given the fact that we do try to be discreet since technically we work together. Okay and technically he is my boss. Does relationships like this even work? I venture to say that at one point I thought this was a fling. But we're now going into year number two...and we're still together. I still have mixed emotions. I love him...but I don't trust him. Maybe I'm just the girl in the office that he's sleeping with....God I need help. Maybe I need to seek counseling instead of writing all this stuff in this little blue box and putting my business out into cyberspace...
I want to break it off with him, because I don't trust him. Which leads me to..how do I become single? Where do I meet people? I think I just need friends and not people that use me. I don't need a rebound relationship...I need a genuine person who cares deeply for me. Not someone who just "says" that they love me..but someone who can truly show me the actions of "love"
Re: Can someone teach me how to be single? flipflopnomore: Well, by being descreet do you mean you never go out in public? Are you sort of a secret? Is the time you spend together purely sexual?
To me, if you are doing only the above then maybe he is using you. It would be very touchy with the boss situation but do you really want to be someone's dirty little secret?
Re: Can someone teach me how to be single? chaotic: I married a woman that worked for me years ago. We lasted 8+ years before she cheated and we divorced, so I think sometimes they can work. It really depends just how discreet you have to be.
As for learning to be single, well its not easy to learn. Its not taught and I dont know of a book you can read that will help. However, if you try it, experience will teach you very quickly.
Dont think about not having someone. Instead focus on yourself and the things you want to do. Soon you will find that singledom is actually kind of fun. You dont have to ask anyone if you can do something, you have free time again, Its actually quite liberating...But takes some getting used to.
And as soon as you start enjoying your free time and looking forward to a nice quiet evening at home...You will start getting dates and someone that is looking to spend that quiet time with you.
Re: Can someone teach me how to be single? asd.me: I totally understand about not knowing how to be single. I really have never actually date dated if that makes sense. Became serious with my husband at age 15, married at 19, and now seperating at 32. I have spent more than half my life with one man. I also have only slept with one man and that scares the shit out of me!!!! Most people have a lot more than that under their belt so in some ways puts me at a disadvantage. I guess right now I am just trying to survive and will some day learn to be single and how to date. I hope ???
Re: Can someone teach me how to be single? PennyLane: re read what you just posted Cher......you already answered your own concerns.
He hasnt brought you around any of his family in one yr of your dating. FLAG. RED ONE
RED FLAG number two. You want to break it off with him. You don't trust him.
I'm getting from your post that you are not that "into" him. Break it off now.
My thoughts have always been to never date a coworker........especially a boss.
Best of luck
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