Re: Why do I still feel like I have to be nice? down2basics: Girl! You are not alone in this arena - believe me! :'( I do that kind of really stupid crap every other week....I'm always trying to make sure he's taken care of....Achy and I have talked about it at length on my thread...it's frustrating as all get out. You sit there, you know you wouldn't have him back if he was covered in $100 bills, but then again, you have this motherly instinct to take care of him...WHY???
I have no idea either - when you figure it out - please let me know too! Geez - I know - it's incredibly frustrating. Hang in there girl!
Hugs!
d2b
Re: Why do I still feel like I have to be nice? achingallover: CUt them off girls...oh, actually, I mean that on many levels with our stbx's! :o ;D
Seriously, though, no more thinking of "being nice" to them. For most of us, this was their choice to leave -and in your case Pisces - ABUSE ...HELLO! count me OUT of that one...you had ot leave - had to take care of yourself, because he sure wasn't takin care of you.
I know, I bought some CD's today and actually thought, "oh, I should burn a copy of these for him". NO!!! He doesn't deserve CDs' ! He doesn't deserve the dog poo on the bottom of my shoe!
Honestly, deep down, he is a VERY messed up man - but he chose to cut me out of his life no matter how much I pleaded for him not to - so he don't get taken care of anymore. I'm serious Pisces, set the boundaries - draw your line in the sand and anyting that crosses it - cut off! ;D
Paxil Hugs to you Pisces Girl - it sounds like you need them big time! I'm sendin ya peacful Paxil vibes.
Achy
Re: Why do I still feel like I have to be nice? barelybreathing: Never apologize for being nice and who you are! Never.
If he wants to be ugly and confrontation and well, CRUDE, then let him.
And don't you ever let him call you a f____ c____ again! You are the mother to his children. You deserve respect girl.
Empowerment is a wonferful thing.
BB
Re: Why do I still feel like I have to be nice? Bob-Bob: I know the feeling... I am still nice to my s2bx and she cheated on me...
I think it say's alot for you and the person you are...
But remeber you don't have to take his Shtuff anymore. You are not sexually frustrating him... he does that to himself. ::)
As for the muffins... hmmmm I kind of like everyones different ideas on that one...hehe ahem. ;D
But quit being nurturing to him, you will only invite more of what he is already giving you. (kind of makes him think you are holding on) :-/
Let him buy his own muffins.
If everyone else cannot see him for who he is then it is not your responsibility to show them... Be you. ;)
Your decision is based on the person that you know him to be, they may not have seen this other side to him.
or have they? Ask yourself " Is the Choice I made the best thing for me?" and if the answer is "Yes" then just be happy with it, You cannot and should not live your life for everyone else.
Bob
"Tomorrow holds new possibilities and endless Horizons"
Re:Why do I still feel like I have to be nice? JASPER: I am also guilty of being nice more like I cant say no.So worried about hurting him and his feelings I cant deal with my own.I dont know why we still feel the need to nuture these people or is it another way of holding on. Our we afraid that if we are to mean we will push them away for good and that may not be what we want just yet.
