For the newbies: superwife: As I woke up this morning, I was lting in bed and thinking about this. A year and a half ago, a year ago, (maybe even a bit) six months ago, I would wake up in a panic, my heart pounding, at 5am almost every morning, even when I didn't need to be up that early (sometimes I did for work). I would lie there and think about all the things I needed to do, bills, divorce issues, him calling me and abusing me over the phone, appointments, all the things I needed to handle on my own. At the time (a year ago, at least), I had a bf (different one than now), but that didn't magically make my problems go away. All of those other problems were still there.
So now, it's almost 2 years (in March). Some of those problems are still there (money is still tight, but better managable), still not divorced (but much closer). It doesn't bother me as much now, b/c I know it will happen (it's just a piece of papaer and when it goes through, I will feel no different). My life has fallen into a routine, I get child supprt $, my daughter is adjusting. I can handle my own affairs, and I can tackle him when needed (that has even died down somewhat...knock on wood). And I found someone who loves me. Someone who I trust and care about, and enjoy.
But I am good. I am real good. I wake up happy, with a normal heartrate, and my mind is not racing.
It gets better. I know you guys are probably sick of hearing that, but it does. It takes time. Be patient. Stick with us. There are some hreat people here. They'll help you through it ;)
Re: For the newbies: flipflopnomore: Great post. Another good thing to do is I go back and reread my posts from last summer when stbxh left. Even 2 months ago!! They are so different. I literally thought I was going to die. Its a great pick me up to realize how far i have come.
Newbies, It wont last forever. The pain may never go away completely, but it will go to a dull ache that is manageable.
Re: For the newbies: tripny2k6: Very good post and thank you. ITs nice to see people who are healing still come here and help out by posting something without being asked. Very nice and caring of you. :-)
Re: For the newbies: Crystal_Blue_024: Great post Kim... I have gone back and read my posts from when I first started here (back in July)... Not able to eat, sleep or even function... And I look at where I am now... It's amazing... I never thought I'd survive, I woke up each morning, dissapointed by the fact that I didn't die in my sleep... But I have survived... I still have my moments, along with dealing with new drama that I have now... But I am SO much better now than I was when I first joined Ojar... So all you newbies, just hang in there.... It does get easier...
Re: For the newbies: Maili: well I've been lurking around here for a while bec my three year relationship ended a few weeks ago. Ive finally decided to post bec I think i was just in denial for a while and now its really hitting me and just have to do something about it now. but it is so encouraging to hear from people who have been through the pain and are doing better....helps me feel less alone...
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