keep revisiting anger/depression/sadness freakshow: Okay so I cut myself some slack for being just six months into this mess!
But I seem to keep going back to these stages, now the most predominant one being sadness...
things sucked
he was cruel...I keep telling myself I wouldn't have been happy with him ever, he is a momma's boy and always will be.
Yet, I am sad, sad mostly for our daughter she has "visitation" with dad when he decides to actually visit her. What a nightmare this is.
To top it all off...I really don't play the part of the divorcing chick so much. I try and keep all conversations light and focused and I don't act depressed. I feel I am looking a lot better than I did in the beginning. But it seems as if no one actually cares. No one calls me or asks how I am doing, no one offers to help me. I am a single mom to a 9 month old, I could really use some help. When I do ask someone for help they do help but I just feel so alone. All my friends - gone. I call for a simple hello how are you doing and they are busy, can't talk for long or if they do they don't even ask me how I am or what's new? How sucky is this!!!!!!
I am so annoyed at the lack of support
I am so annoyed that the only time my phone rings it's my lawyer
can people really be so consumed with themselves that they don't even care their friend is struggling?
Life sucks!
Re: keep revisiting anger/depression/sadness litebrite: I am sorry you are alone. Do you have mostly married friends or single friends? Have you found that married vs single friends are handling your situation differently?
What about your parents or close co-workers. they can be excellent sources of support if you reach out to them and tell them you want it. I am also a very strong person - it's easy for me to hide how I am feeling, which in turn has made people think I am OK and don't need their help. But when I do, all it takes is for me to reach out with a text message or e-mail, to say I need you.
Re: keep revisiting anger/depression/sadness freakshow: mostly married, with kids. they're all just so busy.
my single friend is okay and very kind but a male and not someone I want to hang around too much as his gfriend gets jealous.
I love spending time with my daughter and make every minute for us fun but it would be nice I suppose to have some other people to share that with and go do things with.
I keep reading books, how I am transforming through divorce etc.. how friends will probably change too. It just sucks!
I am only 32, I feel like an old abandoned mom sometimes that no one wants to be around!
:(
Re: keep revisiting anger/depression/sadness freakshow: and yet another thing...
All these things I am reading about (in books mostly) talk about "just move on in life, have a new relationship" etc etc
I have a 9 month old lil girl, i would NOT be dating anyone for a few reasons...as far as I am concerned everyone is a pedophile and I don't want anyone looking at her; no one is even close to good enough to be her step-dad; and I feel so unattractive since my husband filed for divorce that I would be humiliated I am sure trying to date someone.
Besides,,,no time.
I'm screwed!
Re: keep revisiting anger/depression/sadness litebrite: My married friends are much more judgemental than my single friends. Most people tell me that I will be better off and how excited they are for me to be charting my course into a new life, and to discover who I am.
I know it is hard. Sometimes the best support you can have is yourself. Finding out who YOU are. Whereas previously you may have let marriage or your partner define you. Now you have the chance to do a lot of soul searching. Maybe make some new friends. And like I said - parents, relatives, coworkers are wonderful people to lean on because they may not be as tied to your ex as your married friends are.
Keep your head up. Keep reading. I don't have kids, but feel just as alone as you do and go through the denial/depression/anger cycle more than once a day.
Baby steps. :) We take at least one every day. Be well...
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