Re: keep revisiting anger/depression/sadness Phoenix5822: [quote author=freakshow link=topic=40036.msg440728#msg440728 date=1168881536">
and yet another thing...
All these things I am reading about (in books mostly) talk about "just move on in life, have a new relationship" etc etc
I have a lil girl, i would NOT be dating anyone for a few reasons...as far as I am concerned everyone is a pedophile and I don't want anyone looking at her; no one is even close to good enough to be her step-dad; and I feel so unattractive since my husband filed for divorce that I would be humiliated I am sure trying to date someone.
Besides,,,no time.
I'm screwed!
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I can completely relate to that. I question anyone's motives when they try to get close to me too, especially new people, because of my daughter. I don't know why it is, but some married people act like divorce is contagious. The thing I have found is that I was surrounded by love and comfort when he first walked. But it is like a death...once the funeral is over everyone goes home and that is when you truly get lonely. Give people a chance and let them know you need help. People are very busy in their lives and we have to tell them when we need something, they can't read our minds. I have found tremendous support and strength from some of the members here, and will be forever grateful for them (they know who they are ;))
I agree with you, the solution is not finding someone new immediately imo. I think of a broken heart like a broken bone....you have to let it heal before you go out there and take chances with it again. If you go out too soon, and for the wrong reasons (trying to replace what you had), you are setting yourself up for pain. I think we just need to find ways to be ok with being alone before we drag someone else into this mess... :P
Re: keep revisiting anger/depression/sadness freakshow: Thanks for your kind responses.
I am just so bothered by all of this. I mean, I am pissed at him yes but at myself too. I am struggling too with forgiving myself for actually marrying him. I should have moved out when he reacted the way he did to the unexpected pregnancy, I should have left and not looked back. Being hormonal and very confused I stayed. I am pissed!
I could've had better support in place for myself had I just been a single mom from the beginning. Instead I married this dirtbag and isolated myself from anyone who could've been there.
The embarrassement alone is irritating to me. The fact that I said I do to this piece of trash is so annoying and I can't undo it. I made a bad choice and I need to forgive me!
F@#! him and his mother!
