Re:Emotional disconnection ? recentlydiscarded: according to my husband he has been emotionally detached for quite some time. Unfortunately he was a great liar and actor. He never acted or seemed unhappy. Never led on that he didnt want to be with me and our son. He says he kept it all bottled up inside, (which is totally unfair to me and maybe even just a lame reason for his sudden acts of selfishness). I was never emotionally disconnected, still arent. But now that he has turned into this huge ugly monster Im seeing the disconnection. When Im crying, he's laughing at me. When Im telling him how much I hurt, he's telling me "Get over it". When Im telling him that we should do everything possible to work through this, he's telling me "I like being single".
This cold hearted person has no feelings, no emotions. I dont even know him anymore. The man I married would never treat me this way.
Re:Emotional disconnection ? Bubba: Yeah - if any of us were emotional detached - we wouldn't be here!!!!!
Re:Emotional disconnection ? recentlydiscarded: Lets put it this way...I WISH I were emotionally disconnected.
Re:Emotional disconnection ? brokenman: Emotionally detached? No. Emotionally numb. Hell yes!
This is an interesting topic. My marriage had a very large disconnect toward the end. My ex complained of many things that were wrong. I'll admit that things were not right. But I did not and still do not know what I could have done to make things better.
I know from things that she said and wrote in journals that she wanted me to be a different person. She decided along the way that men she worked with were "real men". They drove trucks. They got dirty every day. They built things out of wood. She tried to make me into that man. And that is where I see the disconnect starting.
Inevitably, she got a new job. Volunteered for second shift and avoided coming home whenever she could. That put a major rift between us. She seperated from our family and I resented her for it. Things were definately disconnected when she met her sweaty, dirty boyfriend.
Okay, I just reread what I wrote. And yes, there was an emotional detatchment... on her part. As for me, I was numb. So I guess that counts.
Re:Emotional disconnection ? Druid13: I had simliar reactions from my ex...as she was deciding what to split up ( possessions) I was pleading for us to talk...to try to work things out...anything. She was laughing about it. She either could not...or would not see it was tearing me apart completely inside. Later when I called her one time she answered the phone saying "Hi how are you"...like it was her neighbor or something...my silence was enough of an answer. I firmly think that whatever comes around goes around....it's really easy to say to someone you need to stand on your own feet...when you have someone else to run to. She BTW has NEVER stood completely on her own two feet...ever. She went from boyfriends prior to me living with her parents to being with me in college....to the entire 14 year marriage...to...leaving me for someone else...BTW staying at her parents while she 'saved money' for the whole deal. From the time I found out she was remarrying ( Jan) till today I have seen her face to face exactly once.
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