How do you deal with kids? SadGary: :-[
If my wife leaves, which it looks like will be the case, how the hell am I supposed to deal with not seeing my kids everyday like I do now? My 4 year old has the intillect of a 6 year old and is my best friend literally. We do everything together, I love to teach him manly things i.e. Using tools and fixing things, and I work diligently with him on his reading and writing skills. I can't fatham not seeing him every day when we actually split. My heart aches enough dealing with the fact that my wife will leave, but how do I deal with my son, who can't be replaced. Life is so unfair, I never wanted any of this. I still love the wife, but she is determined to get out of the marriage. I can't eat, have lost 10 lbs in the last 3 weeks, having great trouble going to work. My world is falling apart. Can fatham this new life I'm about to enter. Please send me some advice. I am seeing a Psychologist, but it doesn't help the pain and lonliness.
Re:How do you deal with kids? lowvolt: it's going to be a long hard reality to deal with but take it from me, it gets better over time. my wife left me almost a year ago and i'm still in some degree of pain daily. it does get easier. I have 2 little girls, 2 and 4 , but I have joint custody with the stbx so it's not so bad. Just learn to spend quality time with your son when your together and you'll get through this tough time soon enough. The good thing about it is that just as the saying says, time heals all wounds. It's absolutely true. It's a rollercoaster ride of ups and downs but it gets easier with time and understanding. I know that it seems right now as though things are only getting worse but things will get better. I can't believe it's already been a year since my separation. the time goes by so fast so hang in there. the sooner you accept that your going to go through this and your marriage is over the better you'll eventually be. keep reading the stories in here, it helps a lot to know that your not alone. stay strong and keep your head up high. stay strong for your son and stay active. the worse thing you can do is to sit around and dwell on it, take it from me, I had to learn the hard way. take care and be strong.
Re:How do you deal with kids? Kinney26: It has been 3 1/2 months since my wife left. I have a 3 year old son who is the most important thing in my life. I have joint custody so I see him half the time. I realized that I am going to miss half of his life because of her and that crushes me. It has been an emotional rollercoaster and I still have pleanty of lows, but they don't seem to be as low as they used to be. Things are slowly, sometimes very slowly getting better for me, but it is a grueling process that I don't see any end in site. I just spend the best time I can with my son that I can. We play games and he loves to ride his bike. I just do the best with the time I have and sometimes it does feel good just to have time to myself, but only sometimes.
Re:How do you deal with kids? lookin4alite: Gary,
I have three children (10yr girl, 6 yr girl and 5 yr boy) who live with me, 24x7 except every other weekend and a night a week. I told my wife if she was leaving the kids were staying. It is her loss not mine. I feel a lot of stress daily but the love my little ones give me exceeds all pain my STBX can hit me with.
I don't understand letting the STBX take the children if she wants out or has committed the adultery. I actually love her quite abit but she must endure the loneliness not me. I am not the one deserving the punishment and neither are you.
cheers
Re:How do you deal with kids? Bubba: I'm in a similiar situation as Kenny. I have joint custody of my 2 year old son. Week as my place, one week at the stbx. I did ask my lawyer about getting custody, and his words were "she may be a bad wife, but that does not make her a bad mother". He informed that is pretty much how the courts see it. So he said to be happy with joint custody and that I don't have to pay her anything. It could be worse for you. Not only I am losing half the time I should have had with my son. He gets to move right into the house my stbx and the scumbag she cheated on me with just bought. So all you can do my friend is be the best father you can be and hope that is enough. It sucks, but that is the reality.
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