Re:"its not right" Beren: And you throw me for a loop whenever I see your name as well.
There's a girl at work named Kim. A few weeks into the situation, I started calling her "Good Kim" to differentiate her from my stbx. For a while, I called my stbx "Rockstar" because I could hardly bear to speak her name.
Beren
Re:"its not right" Bob-Bob: Imagine this, Kim is my ex's name as well... LOL
If I were you I would do a search on the internet for divorce laws in california.... also go to the local book store and check for books on the subject... I ended up filing myself and saved tons of cash that way... but sometimes lawyers are a neccesary expense.... not to mention calling Lawyers ...the first visit is usually free...
Bob
Re:"its not right" devochic: You can get an annulment in Cali but you have to justify it most likely as you/he were mentally unstable when you married, or there was fraud (it also works if he was your brother or has a couple extra wives).
It's just a different check mark on the divorce form. As the above members said, a lawyer (or paralegal or someone in the county family law department) can help. I believe you will actually have to justify reasons for the annulment. Sadly, cheating isn't a good enough reason...unless you incorperate it into fraud. Good luck.
If it makes you feel any better my husband and I didn't even consumate our marriage before getting the divorce.
Sometimes they marry for the wrong reason, or think getting married will help fix something that was broken to begin with. I think that's wha happened with me. See if he want to go to therapy. Maybe there are committment fears. Maybe another person. See if he wants to work out the problems. If not, be thankful you found out now instead of in ten years.
Re:"its not right" dtkb: I asked the stupid jerk if he wanted to try therapy. He said no. First he said he has lived 27 years like this so why should he change. Now he says he doesn't want to go because he just know we are not right. He says he has known this for 9-10 months. That was plenty of time before the wedding to stop it! What a jerk! I just don't get it, everything was fine for so long. errrrr
Re:"its not right" Matt: Wow, he sounds like a real Buttweasel...
This might be cold comfort but, I think you're alot better off finding out about this now and not years down the road with kids involved, houses, retirement accounts etc.. Like I said, cold comfort..
I know it sucks right now, but it'll get better..
From you descrition of Him I would characterize him as extremely childish, immature, and fleeing from responsibilty...
Stay strong,
Matt
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