Getting Worse qmambo: I am so getting worse and not better, i am in no contact and we going through lawyers so i will await instructions but he thinks we can be friends to ease his guilt as he has left me here half way round world from my family but not guilty enough to not get me out of the house or moan that i want too much money as we lived together for almost 3 years de-facto. he still thinks its ok to call me whenever about whatever, he even phoned up and asked me the number for the freakin indian takeaway place and i gave it to him like an idiot, and i cant tell him its not okay cos its hanging on, but to what, its been exactly a month today and im drinking everynight to numb the pain - im serisouly worried about my future.
Re: Getting Worse wizer_now: [quote author=qmambo link=topic=41008.msg457543#msg457543 date=1170882197"> i am in no contact...he still thinks its ok to call me whenever about whatever, he even phoned up and asked me the number for the freakin indian takeaway place...and i gave it to him like an idiot
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That's not "no contact". It's him calling whenever the mood suits him, and you still being there for him. Painful for you, and satisfying for him. Just stop it. Unfortunately, you need more than "no contact" at this point.
[quote author=qmambo link=topic=41008.msg457543#msg457543 date=1170882197"> im drinking everynight to numb the pain - im serisouly worried about my future.
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You need help. You're in crisis mode, especially with the nightly drinking and the difficulties at work that you spoke of in another thread. You must get yourself some professional help. PLEASE DO IT NOW. Your life may depend on it.
Re: Getting Worse qmambo: Im not taking his calls which is one thing but im wallowing in the fact that he is calling - he called twice this morning and i fantasise about why - why does he need to call me to satisfy himself when he called it off, why should he even want to talk to me when he said i am so horrible - why would someone do that?????? its hard getting help here in this country, mum says come home and she will sort me out but there is 2 out of 100% of me (and no more) that wants to be alright and positive and look forward and right now that 2% is pulling all of my weight and its cracking. I look like shit and its such an effort to do the smallest of things. I dont know who to ask for help professionally?????
Re: Getting Worse qmambo: This just made me smile, I got an e-mail from my aunt in response to an e-mail i sent her this morning:-
What I said:-
he said i moaned about everything and that i argued with him all the time - stupid things like he signed himself up for saturday soccerr which is every single saturday for the whole day and then drinks after with his mates without a thought for me when he was trying to get me to move here he said we would go away at weekends together and have fun, he wasnt a very openly loving bloke, he always said i will never leave NZ for you, he kept me dangling on about kids, he never actually ever made me feel like he did really love me Mar you know, i am a very expressive person and he used to say "love ya" or txt it but i never really felt it - and i used to say that to him -his way of loving me was sortin out my immigration or paying for my contact lenses - he used to say that must show you how much i love you??????
Her reply:-
what a pratt he is and yes you had every right to have a go at him what did he exspect you to do sit at home and wait for him (i dont think so love ) if you ask me he done you a favor love you can do beter just have a bit of confidences in your self your gona be ok beleive me i know you will xx
Re: Getting Worse wizer_now: [quote author=qmambo link=topic=41008.msg457577#msg457577 date=1170883079"> I dont know who to ask for help professionally?????
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I would start with your family MD. Explain that you are having an emotional crisis and you need to see someone immediately.
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