where do you get the strength? kindred1: This is kind of a follow up to my "confused" thread. Where do you all find the strength to follow through with no contact? I feel like I must be the weakest woman alive. For a while, I had no contact forced on me because my husband refused to communicate with me or respond to me if I contacted him, so I left him alone. But lately he has been contacting me. expressing remorse, but not putting any actions behind his words. We do not have children, so that's not an issue. I know logically that I should simply delete his messages, but I keep giving in, and I respond back to him. How do you bring yourself to just ignore somebody that you still love so much? How do you just turn off those old feelings and move on?
Re: where do you get the strength? flipflopnomore: I have no idea. When you find out let me know....
I sometimes feel like I am an addict trying to be in recovery when it comes to stbxh. I can keep myself from contacting him but its a struggle. The second he contacts me I am fighting major urges to give in and play the game. But then I have to beat myself upside the head and remember that is exactly what it is to him......a game. He has no intentions of ever making this right otherwise he would have. It just feeds his ego and his pride to know that I am still here.
Re: where do you get the strength? MelanieW: Flip I think that was a wonderful way to describe what we all go through. It IS just like being addicted to something...only in our case it is someone. Learning to live life without that "drug" is the hardest part. Once we have kicked the habit, though, our lives become so much more bearable. I think that is a good way to look at all of this!
Re: where do you get the strength? qmambo: i simply hav to do the no contact thing cos my partner going cold and dumpin me so unexpectedly last month has had such a sever effect om me mentally that iam scared to speak to him, i long fr him to ring and put it all alright but wheni see his number come up i go stiff wqith fear literally so i just dont repond to him, the other night he trikd me by using a no i didnt recognise and i ended up talking to him but i hated it afterwards i felt like i was putting his mind at ease while mine was being fuc**d with. so awful guys but we will all get through it
