Re: When They've Moved On Beachchick: You are so right....
"If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend..."
Why do you think they do that? Out of comfort? I mean, I told him, "I tried to talk to you for a year, and you were a jerk. I dont think talking to me now will help".
I have never been one to say, "Oh he'll regret it", because I don't think people actually do regret their mean actions.
I will never know. I just hope he leaves me alone, because everytime he contacts me...even if I don't respond, he just opens up old wounds.
Now that I think about it, I'm PISSED for letting him do that to me.. How the HELL does that happen?
People always say, "Don't give them control" but how do you NOT feel anything?
What is the secret??
Re: When They've Moved On browneyedgurl: To wrap all this up... you guys are the best. I've put my chin up another notch and am going about living my life.
As a closer, here's what happened. This ex of which I'm speaking is the first guy I got serious with after my husband and I divorced. As it turns out, the girl he is with now is an old high school ex-girlfriend of his. He broke up with her when they were teens because 1: she told him he was cruel and inconsiderate, and 2: he agreed with her and said they'd make better friends than lovers. She never got over him though and all these years had been in love with him. He told me openly about her when we were dating saying that she was a friend and he never saw her in that romantic way.
Funny, because now that I know it's pretty obvious he's with her because he needs an ego stroke and a cheerleader in his corner. They will have to deal with their own issues as they develop but something tells me she'll be hurt again as she's just another rebound.
All I can do is heal me to be the best person I can for the next person who comes into my life.
Good luck to all and thank you.
Re: When They've Moved On ctrlaltdelete: What's the secret? Easy. Move on with YOUR life.
I have rebuilt my life pretty much from scratch. It has been three and a half years now since my old life ended with the annilation of my 14 year marriage. I honestly feel "born again". I like my life so much better now and it is so much better than when he was in it.
I can honestly say, I don't really give a rats @ss what he's doing or how he's moved on as long as he keeps me out of it. He could go to the moon or be shovelling elephant-poop in a parade, I really couldn't care less. And to think there was a point where I would have sold my soul just to have him back. <wretch> :-&
Re: When They've Moved On MelanieW: [quote author=qmo link=topic=41502.msg465749#msg465749 date=1171945747">
I dont believe people can just go from loving someone to loing someone new just like that - either he had left you mentally a long time ago (which is prob true and dont shoot me for sayin this but i think its more of a guy thing to do than a girl thing as it takes logic to do that not emotion and men prefer logic) or he is a serious rebounder (which could be true also) but i dont know your story - what happened?????
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Im inclined to agree with this. My stbxh started a relationship 2 days after telling me he wanted a divorce. Of all the things I had to deal with that was the hardest part. He made it look so real...as if he really had moved on. I know now that wasnt the case. He is trying very hard to form that relationship simply because he doesnt know how to be without a woman in his life. I do think he has feelings for her, but they dont run as deep as he wants everyone to believe they do. It's one of those things where he talks about it TOO much. I'm not sure who he is trying harder to convince....everyone else or himself.
Re: When They've Moved On MEP2006: WOOOOOHOOOOO!!!! I think we're ALL eager for the day when we can say the same thing!
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