Fiance leaves me, with no explanation, except that she's not happy anymore. loveblue: My fiance and I broke up almost 3 weeks ago. When she left me, she just called me on the phone and told me to let her go, because she's unhappy. What I couldn't understand was that hours before that, we were laughing and talking on the phone. She even told me that we really needed to save up for our upcoming wedding, and that she's really counting on me to be the strength of our future family, and she told me not to worry about the ring. (Yes I haven't given her the ring yet) She told me that she would accept anything I give her so I was saving for a good one. I was just caught so off guard. I didn't see this coming and she just dropped the bomb on me whenever she wanted.
We've been together for quite awhile. When we met, she was a screw up. She didn't know what she wanted in her life, she was always lost and unhappy. She was used and abused by her past men. Basically at her age 25, she was still in limbo trying to figure out who she was and what she wanted to do. Then we met, we made an instant connection, and I started changing her life for the better. She became happier, had more direction with her life, improved her relationship with her parents, and I continually encouraged her to be proactive with her job and her life. I influenced her with the best I can to stay positive with her views, and that the world is not just about handbags, shoes or jewelry, that there's more important things in life than the material things she wants.
We fell deeply in love and she just told me one day "What took you so long to find me? I've been waiting for you all my life." She was so in love with me, yet for her it was all about the love and just that. We made love everyday sometime more, and she was always satisfied beyond her wildest dreams. I gave her everything she wanted, I drove her almost everyday to and from work, met her during her breaks because she wanted company and she would call every time she didn't have anything to do. I was alarmed that I may be smoothening her, so we had a conversation, and she said she wanted me to pamper and spoil her. I didn't agree at first because I wanted her to be independent. Still, I gave in to her, I love her so I did whatever it takes to make her happy.
So as the story goes, life for her was so convenient, I bought her a car, gave her a credit card, included her in my cellphone. Basically, I've been paying for all her expenses. On top of the money, I was there every single day, giving her all the understanding, patience and love.
She doesn't understand the pressure she brings me. I try to help her, but want her to be independent too. I mean, I can't do everything for her. I love her but I want her to be strong. The past month, we started fighting a lot. Although we'd make up immediately afterwards, and just laugh at our fight. Still, deep inside me I was ready to explode and started hanging by thread.
Anyways, we still made things work out, we settled our differences and always was happy, laughing and sticking by each other, until we go on a road trip to D.C and West Virginia. That's where we decided we'd get married because after that long drive we realized that we do can handle each other and be there for each other no matter what. When we got back, we started planning for the wedding, looking at different reception sites, caterers, started our budget planning and all. The next day we fight, I exploded because after all we've been through and all the sacrifices, she just wants to get what she wants, and it doesn't matter to her how hard it would be for me to accomplish it. So after that fight we still talk for two more days and that's when she dropped the bomb.
In fairness to you all, I have OCD and clinical depression. Still it was not in the way of our relationship since I treated her well, loved her well, and served her to the best I can. She knows all these and realized how lucky she was to have me, despite my disorder. She knew it from the start and stuck with me.
When my depression was going bad, and my finances were going down, considering the stuffs she wants, needs etc. It's just a coincidence that she leaves me. Maybe she realized I'm not the man of steel so she dumps me after all I've done and given her. The things, I gave her my whole heart, and all of me. I haven't called her since. I just wrote her a letter telling her that I’m just here understanding her.
I haven't heard from her since then, no text, no call, no email, no letters. I can't understand where I went wrong. She had a good life, and got everything she wanted and needed. Love isn't pefect, she thinks that when I come to her life all her worries will be washed away. She's there and loves me when it's convenient, and disappears when issues arises. She doesn't realize that life is not just about love, it also about living, surviving and making love work out. Life is so unfair...
Re: Fiance leaves me, with no explanation, except that she's not happy anymore. octoberbaby: You sound like a wonderful person, and it also sounds like you got taken advantage of. No disrespect but this is my opinion it sounds like she used you for your money, love, and respect. And now she knows you want to get married and that scared her because she may never wanted to marry in the first place. When somebody is going down the wrong path and another person swoops in and makes it all better they latch onto you but later on they realize it wasn't a love in the same way as you loved her. And there could posssibly be somebody else. I'm really sorry this has happeded to you and good luck with it all!!!
Re: Fiance leaves me, with no explanation, except that she's not happy anymore. darkrose: [quote author=octoberbaby link=topic=41527.msg466345#msg466345 date=1171999239">
You sound like a wonderful person, and it also sounds like you got taken advantage of. No disrespect but this is my opinion it sounds like she used you for your money, love, and respect. And now she knows you want to get married and that scared her because she may never wanted to marry in the first place. When somebody is going down the wrong path and another person swoops in and makes it all better they latch onto you but later on they realize it wasn't a love in the same way as you loved her. And there could posssibly be somebody else. I'm really sorry this has happeded to you and good luck with it all!!!
[/quote">
Yep. My stbxw did the same thing, methinks.
Re: Fiance leaves me, with no explanation, except that she's not happy anymore. Percy123: Alright...So the big question...What were you getting out of this relationship?
Re: Fiance leaves me, with no explanation, except that she's not happy anymore. fkunone: [quote author=loveblue link=topic=41527.msg466320#msg466320 date=1171997788">
Life is so unfair...
[/quote">
This is the first step in your recovery from this. Good luck.
Click More for the next page.
